IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Your school demands that you wear a school uniform. Do you think that you have the right to wear whatever clothes you wish?

#school #demands #uniform #right #clothes
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Schooling years
is
Suggestion
are
 a phase of life, almost all of us go through.
However
Linking Words
, it is highly debatable whether students should be given a choice for their attire they wear to
school
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss the importance of
school
Use synonyms
 uniforms and place forward an argument as to why students must adhere to a uniform dress code. Many people think that students must have the right to choose the clothes they wear to
school
Use synonyms
 and argue that their likes and dislikes must be respected. A few students prefer wearing clothes which
makes
Suggestion
make
 them appear fashionable.
Although
Linking Words
, these arguments are valid, students must remember that the basic purpose of schooling is to gain knowledge. Selecting an attire every day may be a time-consuming and tedious process which students must undergo and hinders in their schedule.
For instance
Linking Words
, studies reveal that 70% students in the US spend half-
an
Suggestion
a
-hour a day in deciding what to wear.
However
Linking Words
, uniforms solve
this
Linking Words
 problem.
Also
Linking Words
, the uniform hides disparities among children belonging to different social backgrounds. Not only does it increase a sense of belonging to an
institution but
Accept comma addition
institution, but
also
Linking Words
 enhances the unity among students. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
school
Use synonyms
 uniform may curb children of the right to choose their attire, on the whole, they benefit students.
Hence
Linking Words
, in my opinion schools' demand of uniforms is completely justified.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: