Some people think that the government is responsible for the rise in obesity in children, while others think it is the fault of the parents. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

#people #government #rise #obesity #children #fault #parents

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Some people in our world believe that legal bodies are mainly reasonable

for

Suggestion

increase in overweight in children, while some other people think parents are responsible for

children

Suggestion

child

obesity

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. In my opinion,

refers to the speaker or writer

agree that both government and parents are equally responsible for

obesity

Use synonyms

in children.

This

Linking Words

essay will look at the key features of how

government

Suggestion

the government

and parents are responsible for their

child

Use synonyms

obesity

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Firstly

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, governments while playing a major role in developing

civilization it

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civilization, it

has started to prepare academic curriculum which lacks extracurricular activities and sports

further

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making their physical fitness to null. Physical fitness and exercise play a major role in keeping a

child

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body and mind healthy and away from

obesity

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However

Linking Words

, on the other side, governments are planning to commercialize by encouraging fast food centres and restaurants that attract children and making them consume oil and fat foods which gets accumulated in their body leading to

obesity

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Secondly

Linking Words

, parents are

also

Linking Words

considered to be responsible for

child

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overweight. Most of the parents

are preferring

Suggestion

prefer

their

child

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to advance their mindset along with technology by providing them with mobile phones and laptops so as to become successful in future. Though it is

helful but

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helpful, but

helpful but

technology is making children to study and play at one single place and making them away from social activities, which is leading to major drawback in maintaining physical fitness leading to

obesity

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. Overall, I would conclude that, If, both legal bodies and parents take a step to include and maintain physical

excercise

the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit

exercise

in their daily life and curriculum, it would lead to their children, a healthy environment and a positive impact on society.

Thu Oct 24 2019

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

271 words

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Some people think that the government is responsible for the rise in obesity in children, while others think it is the fault of the parents. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

Fully explain your ideas

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Some people focus on news in their country, while others think it is more important to be aware of international news. Discuss both views and give your opinion.