Today people can work and live anywhere they want, because of the improvements in communicant technology and transport. Do advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #work #improvements #communicant #technology #transport #development

It is true that in

this

advanced era, it becomes possible for individuals to do

job

Suggestion

the job

a job

and stay in any sphere of the world due to advancements in telecommunication and automobile sector.

Although

Suggestion

Despite

this

trend in

work

culture has been criticized due to having some drawbacks

Accept space

I strongly believe that it is far beneficial for workers as well as employers. On the one hand, there are some downsides of

this

technology

Accept space

Firstly

this

modern

technology

results in inclining sedentary lifestyle among

masses

Suggestion

the masses

which

further

becomes the reason of health issues like obesity

Accept space

hyper tension

a common disorder in which blood pressure remains abnormally high (a reading of 140/90 mm Hg or greater)

hypertension

etcetera

Accept space

Moreover

Accept space

working at home

also

deter the people in developing certain skills like leadership qualities

Accept space

team collaboration

Accept space

problem solving abilities

Accept space

as on

work

premises employees get

chance

Suggestion

a chance

the chance

work

collaboratively with their superiors and inferiors

Accept space

Moreover

, excessive dependence on

technology

also

makes

users handicapped

Accept comma addition

users, handicapped

in some situations like any failure in

network

Suggestion

the network

a network

may lead the life to

standstill

Suggestion

stand still

Finally

automobile industry

Suggestion

the automobile industry

has

also

intensified the consumption of natural resources and pollution level when whole the globe is suffering from the scarcity of these valuable sources.

On the other hand

, there are enormous benefits of

this

changing trend in

work field

Suggestion

the work field

First

and foremost, it makes available diversified job choices for the individuals as they can

work

for any company around the globe which was not possible in earlier days.

This

kind of

work

culture

also

helps in reducing the unemployment

also

as applicants are not confined to

work

in their own nation.

In addition

, modern wireless

technology

has made life easy and comfortable with providing flexible working hours and multitasking

as a

result people

Accept comma addition

result, people

nowadays are having much time to spend with their family members.

Last

but not least,

this

advanced

technology

has put some

halt

a form of energy that is transferred by a difference in temperature

heat

on brain drain and urbanization

also

as people do not need to migrate to

another

not the same one or ones already mentioned or implied

other

cities or countries for job. In conclusion, no doubt

this

cutting edge

technology

alienate

Suggestion

alienates

the people from one another, I believe that it is proving a boon for the humanity.

Submitted by miss.nehawadhwa on Fri Oct 25 2019

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
24Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

344 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Today people can work and live anywhere they want, because of the improvements in communicant technology and transport. Do advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Most people agree that money cannot buy happiness. Do you think people can be happy without money? What other factors contribute toward happiness?

Some people believe that the money spend on space exploration technology is not justifiable. The money should be spent on other beneficial things. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Millions of dollars are spent on space research every year. Some people argue that the money should be soent on improving living standards on Earth. Do you agree or disagree?

in some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. what are the reasons for this? how can people research this?

Write about the following topic: Should education and healthcare be free of charge and funded by the government, or should it be the responsibility of the people to pay for these services? To what extent you agree or disagree?