Some people think that the main purpose of schools is to teach children to be a good citizen or worker rather than to benefit them as individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

OWING TO THE FACT THAT SOME

PEOPLE

Use synonyms

SPEND THEIR ENTIRE LIFE GETTING AN EDUCATION JUST TO SERVE THEIR COUNTRY IN ONE WAY OR ANOTHER I TOTALLY AGREE THAT EDUCATION DOES NOT BENEFIT

PEOPLE

Use synonyms

IN THEIR PERSONAL GROWTH AS INDIVIDUALS. TO START WITH A NUMBER OF

PEOPLE

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STUDY EXTENSIVELY IN OTHER TO BE RECRUITED INTO THE MILITARY TO HELP THE GOVERNMENT FIGHT COMBATS, THEREBY IMPEDING THEIR UNIQUE DEVELOPMENT THAT COMES WITH FAMILY BONDS AND

SELF DISCOVERY

Add a hyphen

SELF-DISCOVERY

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. IT IS

DUE TO

Linking Words

THE FACT THAT

ALOT

Correct your spelling

A LOT

PEOPLE

Use synonyms

LOOSE

Replace the word

LOSE

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THEIR LIVES

FIGTHING

Correct your spelling

FIGHTING

GLOBAL WARS.

THEREFORE

Linking Words

, THERE IS A CONSTANT NEED FOR REINFORECEMENTS LIVING

PEOPLE

Use synonyms

WITHOUT THEIR LOVED ONES.

ACCORDING TO

Linking Words

A SURVEY THAT WAS CARRIED OUT IN AUSTRALIA, A THOUSAND

PEOPLE

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LOOSE

Replace the word

LOSE

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THEIR

LIVE

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LIVES

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FIGHTING ANNUALLY, YET A LARGE NUMBER ARE COAXED INTO JOINING FROM THE

AGES

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AGE

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OF EIGHTEEN.

ACCORDING TO

Linking Words

POPLUAR

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POPULAR

BELIEVE

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BELIEF

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, IT CAN BE CLEARLY OBSERVED THAT HUMANS ARE GROOMED FROM A TENDER AGE TO SERVE THE GOVERNMENT REGARDLESS OF HOW MANY LIVES ARE LOST. ANOTHER POINT TO CONSIDER IS THE LAWS THAT ARE STRICTLY TAUGHT IN SCHOOLS WHICH GOVERN THE WAY OF LIFE OF THE PUBLIC. IT IS INTERESTING TO NOTE THAT THE PAYMENT OF TAXES IS A VERY KEEN SUBJECT IN A BRANCH OF SOCIAL SCIENCE COURSE WHICH IS COMPULSORY FOR BEGINNERS IN MIDDLE SCHOOL.

MOREOVER

Linking Words

, EMPHASIS

PLACED

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IS PLACED

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ON THE IMPORTANCE OF OBEYING THE RULES OF STRICT PAYMENT WHICH IS TAUGHT TO

UPLIFTS

Wrong verb form

UPLIFT

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ONE AS A GOOD CITIZEN. ADMITTEDLY, IN THE

AFFOREMENTIONED

Correct your spelling

AFOREMENTIONED

COURSE THERE ARE NO GUIDES ON BEING A BETTER HUMAN, IT ONLY DENOTES WHAT

PEOPLE

Use synonyms

CAN DO FOR

ITS

Correct pronoun usage

apply

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SOCIETY.

TO CONCLUDE

Linking Words

, I SUPPORT THE NOTION THAT

SAYS

Verb problem

apply

show examples

SCHOOLING NOWADAYS DOES NOT BENEFIT A PERSON FOR HIS OWN GOOD BUT RATHER FOR

THE

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

SOCIETY BECAUSE OF WHAT IS BEING PRIORITIZED IN THE SCHOOL SYSTEM AND THE LURES THAT COME WITH JOINING THE FORCES.

m.antiques01

Oct 26, 2019

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task achievement

Make sure your main points are clear and supported by more examples. This will help support your argument.

coherence and cohesion

Try to improve the flow of your essay. Use more linking words to connect your ideas and paragraphs better.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure to check grammar and punctuation. Some sentences are difficult to understand because of mistakes.

task achievement

You show clear agreement with the idea that education does not always benefit individuals personally.

task achievement

Your essay has a strong opinion, which is important for this type of writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

306 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

pedagogical approach
civic responsibility
vocational skills
holistic development
critical thinking
emotional intelligence
personal interests
community involvement
effective employees
educational institutions
societal norms
personal growth
competent citizens

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Some people think that the main purpose of schools is to teach children to be a good citizen or worker rather than to benefit them as individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Most countries aim to improve their standard of living through economic development, but many important social values can be lost as a result. Do the advantages of economic development outweigh the disadvantages?

Should long-term job seekers in receipt of government benefits be made to do voluntary work so that they give something back to the community?

Computer and AI are being increasingly being used for online education. Can AI enhance the learning experience? Is this a positive or negative development?

Some people say cheap air travel is good because it enables ordinary people to travel ,while others argue that it is bad for the environment. Discuss both views ,and include your opinion.

Some people believe that history should be taught to children at school. Others however,believe that there are other subjects that are more relevant to children's lives. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.