New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

The way young people spend their free time has always evolved. The new change is because of the introduction of technology into the lives of the current generation.
This
essay examines the advantages and disadvantages and provides evidence to prove how the cons outweigh the pros
Firstly
, children these days have unlimited access to a lot of educational content.
This
content is freely available on the internet and can be read or seen through most devices like television, cell phones, computers etc.
For instance
, apps like Byju have excellent free videos across classes and you will often find students glued to their
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
show examples
, learning from
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
. Another important benefit is the fact that relying on tech during leisure hours
also
opens up a whole new door
of
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to
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the social world for young people. They can connect to the people of their interest, learn from them and understand a variety of cultures. If you look at a portal called LinkedIn,
for example
, it has professionals across industries and it provides a great platform for kids to find a mentor.
However
, kids have reduced going out and playing which has reduced their physical activities.
This
is mostly because they find all the entertainment that they need, on
the
Correct article usage
apply
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mobile devices.
For example
, they'd prefer watching a couple of videos on the phone rather than going out in the garden.
Secondly
, they have uncontrolled access
over
Change preposition
to
show examples
content which could be dangerous for them. Hardly anybody monitors what a child reads, watches or plays. Recent incidents of suicide because of the Blue Whale App is a classic example of
this
issue.
To conclude
, even though technology comes with a number of positive things, depending on it even during your free time is not advisable.
This
is because a number of disadvantages like safety and staying indoors
outweighs
Change the verb form
outweigh
show examples
its advantages.

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task achievement
Provide a clear thesis statement in the introduction.
task achievement
Expand on the advantages and disadvantages with more specific examples and explanations.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focused on a specific point and provide clear topic sentences.
coherence cohesion
Consider using transition words and phrases to improve the flow between ideas.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary to enhance the lexical resource.
grammatical range accuracy
Pay attention to some grammatical errors and improve sentence structures to increase grammatical range and accuracy.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • new technologies
  • children
  • free time
  • access
  • educational resources
  • information
  • development
  • key skills
  • enhancing
  • creativity
  • imagination
  • opportunity
  • connect
  • convenience
  • flexibility
  • lack
  • physical activity
  • potential
  • health issues
  • impact
  • social
  • emotional development
  • exposure
  • inappropriate content
  • addiction
  • dependency
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