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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Achievements are an important part of a person's career, though some people believe that they are much more important than others. What do you feel is the most important factor of working?

Accomplishments are
essential part
Suggestion
an essential part
 of an individual’s
job
Use synonyms
. Despite the fact, part of the society is of the belief that they are vitally important than others. The factors which have contributed to
this
Linking Words
 statement
are
introduces an alternative
or
 that
employee’s
Suggestion
employee
 motivation, and
job
Use synonyms
 satisfaction. I believe that achievements are important because it is tangible evidence that use to judge a person and more success or less. Because it makes the person to be happy at the
Use synonyms
work place
a place where work is done
workplace
 and
also
Linking Words
 to have a healthy mentality and a balanced life. Achievements makes the employee to be more
motivate
Suggestion
motivated
 to
work
Use synonyms
, since it improves the
job
Use synonyms
 satisfaction which leads to perform high quality
work
Use synonyms
. When an employee
get
Suggestion
gets
 acknowledged by the staff it
make
Suggestion
makes
 a positive impact to peruse an interest in the
career
Use synonyms
. In my point of view to achieve a goal within the
job
Use synonyms
 we have to
work
Use synonyms
 hard for it.
Ther
Suggestion
There
 are many consequences of working hard
.
Accept space
.
 It improves the employee’s skills to handle
challenges
Suggestion
the challenges
. To withstand in tough times and
also
Linking Words
 resilience to
work
Use synonyms
 under pressure. Being able to
persue
carry out or participate in an activity; be involved in
pursue
parse
peruse
interest
Suggestion
interests
 in the
career
Use synonyms
 makes the
work
Use synonyms
 a sense of pleasure, pride and joy. The result of working happily at the
Use synonyms
work place
a place where work is done
workplace
 makes the employee less stress and it helps to maintain a proper healthy mentality.
For
Linking Words
example when
Accept comma addition
example, when
 someone is having
a
Suggestion
an
 interest in their
career
Use synonyms
 they are more able to achieve more goals and they will be
acknowledge
Suggestion
acknowledged
 by their
staff which
Accept comma addition
staff, which
 leads to be more motivated and to be successful in the
career
Use synonyms
. In conclusion being able to achieve goals within the
career
Use synonyms
 makes the employer more motivated and it makes them more
job
Use synonyms
 satisfied and it leads to have a healthy pleasurable balanced working lifestyle.
This
Linking Words
 writer believes that
achievements
Suggestion
achievement
are
Suggestion
is
 an important part of
person’s
Suggestion
a person’s career
the person’s career
career
Use synonyms
.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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