Having more money and less free time is better than having less money and more free time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#money #time

This

is the actual

situation what

Accept comma addition

situation, what

most of the individuals face. Most of them run behind earning and never think about free

time

. And in other

hand there

Accept comma addition

hand, there

are people who have a lot

free

Suggestion

more free

time

and not bothered about

tthe

definite article

the

earnings.

Actually both

Accept comma addition

Actually, both

are

necesary

absolutely essential

necessary

a in common life. There are people who totally run behind earnings. They are not worried about the surroundings.

This

attitude is actually

dangers

involving or causing danger or risk; liable to hurt or harm

dangerous

to them because

likewise

they may lose the one around him/her. The people who run behind earnings will never go for any kind of

pleasuer

a fundamental feeling that is hard to define but that people desire to experience

pleasure

, they do full

time

job.

Moreover

, they will forget

there

of them or themselves

their

family and loved once. The one who

love

Suggestion

loves

to be rich, they are the most selfish

person

. They will be behind finding ways to earn cash. If they become selfish

person

then

there won't be anyone close to them. Most importantly, they end up with committing some crimes. Even though, wasting

time

also

a impinge. Some of them spend

time

without any reason and don't do any job. These people are least bothered about earning wealth.

Hoever

Suggestion

However

this

also

not a right thing. A

person

should earn enough to get respect in the society.

Also without

Accept comma addition

Also, without

wealth a

person

can't

servive

continue to live through hardship or adversity

survive

service

. He/she should earn for them self to get some respect and position in the society. For

intance

an occurrence of something

instance

, my uncle was

simpling

a chad that has been punched or dimpled but all four corners are still attached

dimpling

sampling

sitting at home for many years without any job and no one knows him. Few years

ego he

Accept comma addition

ego, he

flied

run away quickly

fled

flew

flown

to foreign and started working there. After

thet

pointing out something

that

when he

make

Suggestion

makes

a visit to home, people

whould

past tense of "will"

would

run to him

Accept space

This

is how the actual world is. So to conclude, a

person

should work for his day to day expenses not for the luxury life.

Likewise

, people should equally give

importence

the quality of being important and worthy of note

importance

for the free

time

Therefor

Suggestion

Therefore

its

it is

it's

important to earn money and have free

time

in life. There should be

proper balance

Suggestion

a proper balance

for it.

Submitted by ashithageethanjali on Thu Oct 31 2019

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

323 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

financial security
facilitating
lifestyle
professional development
increased stress
work-life balance
hobbies
quality time
physical and mental health
financial constraints
luxury items
overall well-being
personal growth
middle ground
sacrificing

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Having more money and less free time is better than having less money and more free time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views! What is your own opinion?

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"Some people think that the government should provide free education at every level. Others believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to pay for their education. Discuss both views and give your own opinion."