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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think that employers should ensure a supportive and pleasant work environment where each employee is respected and valued equally while others think employers should focus instead on providing better facilities and equipment . What is your opinion?

#people #employers #work #environment #employee #focus #facilities #equipment
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Some individuals are of a view that entrepreneurs should create a workplace, which is healthy and supportive
for
Suggestion
of
 the workers, and it recognises them for their achievements. While others believe that employers exclusively need to focus on upgrading the equipment. I personally agree with the former viewpoint because it will keep the workforce motivated and reduce turnovers.
To begin
 with, creating an environment that respects and values the workers will help the employees to feel a sense of
fulfillment
a feeling of satisfaction at having achieved your desires
fulfilment
. It will not only make them happy, but
also
 motivate them to achieve their endeavours.
In other words
, when people get recognition for their accomplishments, they tend to achieve greater heights, which in turn leads to the success of the organisation as well as
growth
Suggestion
the growth
 of the individuals.
For instance
, Amazon offers various rewards to its employees regularly to recognise their achievements.
As a result
, its personnel feel highly content and enthusiastic.
Furthermore
, an organisation with a positive atmosphere will
also
 reduce employee turnover considerably. Since the employees feel motivated, they will neither want to leave the organisation, nor will they be absent for a single day, and
therefore, employee
Suggestion
therefore, an employee
 retention rate will be improved which will result in reduced turnover.
Moreover
, increase in retention will
also
 lead to greater productivity and
hence
, the success of the firm. To illustrate, it has been found that many big industrialists in some Asian countries are able to retain more and more employees in the past few years, owing to the healthy work environment. In conclusion, I strongly believe that it is the primary responsibility of an employer to build a workplace that respects and values its employees, in order to keep them satisfied and reduce employee turnovers.
Submitted by amannayyar.angel197 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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