These days, mobile phones and the internet are very important to the way in which people relate to one another socially. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Internet and cell phones have offered a myriad of applicable methods in several aspects in modern life; their online applications on social relationships have become indispensable.
Although
there are still drawbacks of interact socially online by these ways, I believe that their advantages are more significant.
To begin
with, depending on mobile online applications to communicate with
others could
Accept comma addition
others, could
cause hazardous influence on individuals’ psychological state. To illustrate, a recent study by the University of Singapore, involved about 10.000 psychological patients, showed that 3 out of 10 of these patients are suffering from alienation and loneliness
as a result
of their social
behaviors
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviour
behaviours
, and the lack of face-to-face
interact
Suggestion
interaction
interactions
with their social networks is a major contributory factor. As
this
example illustrated, if people communicate with others online without enjoy the sense of gathering,
this
could result a psychological
disturbances
Suggestion
disturbance
.
Nevertheless
, I suppose the advantages of using online social platforms would eclipse their negatives as saving time is one of these merits. To clarify, many people could keep in touch with their beloved ones all day long throughout mobile apps which facilitate their communication.
For example
, organizing social events, namely birthday parties or family outing, have become easier by creating an event on Facebook, the well-known social platform.
Furthermore
, social media facilitate gaining information by its instant notifications; people could realize a plethora of world news which enrich their knowledge.
For instance
, many people all over the world updated with the Egyptian revolution events, in 2011, by surfing the internet
such
as Google and YouTube websites.
Hence
, not only do online applications facilitate people’s social communication, but
also
it could provide them with valuable information. In conclusion, despite the negative influence of using smart phones and the internet on individuals’ psychological state, I hold the notion that these
applications advantages
Accept comma addition
applications, advantages
exceed its drawbacks it may cause as facilitating communications and gaining information are obvious merits of them.
Submitted by g.fattah on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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