IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Life was better when technology was simpler. To what extent do you agree and disagree ?

#life #technology
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It is argued that our life was more fulfilling when the technology was less complex.
This
Linking Words
 essay totally disagrees with
this
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 statement and believes that the smartphones have speed up the communication and the
internet
Use synonyms
 has enhanced the education system. Smartphones have made the transfer of data to the receiver at the lightening speed.
That is
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 to say, earlier when these technological advancements were not made it took weeks to send a photo or video to the other location via sending the couriers' containing the physical discs.
Hence
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, the invention of smart phones has made it hassle free and quick to transfer
such
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 data.
For example
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, before the smartphones were not present, it was not possible for the parents to see their child who went abroad for the
further
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 studies, but these days they can communicate via video call at their fingertips. The
Internet
Use synonyms
 has revolutionised the way people learn today.
In other words
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, before the invention of the
internet
Use synonyms
, learners often had to rely on the resources
such
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 as books and magazines of their own or that were available in the libraries,
therefore
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 the source of knowledge was limited and it required a huge amount of effort to extract the information, but
as a result
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 of the
internet
Use synonyms
 today, everything is available at the few clicks.
For example
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, when I was a child, I was asked to create a history project on the Civilization of Mohenjodaro, I had to refer my text books and books from the library but now I can make use of the
internet
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, the modern technology of the smartphones and the
internet
Use synonyms
 has improved the life by enabling the communication quick and the availability of the information anywhere at anytime.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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