IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Nowadays more people are choosing to socialise online rather than face to face. Why is this happening? Is this a positive or negative development?

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It is true that in recent times there is an increase in the number of people who rather communicate online than in
person
Use synonyms
. There are several reasons for the same, and in my
opinion
Accept comma addition
opinion, this
this
Linking Words
 is a negative development. An array of reasons can be quoted as to why people choose to socialise online rather than in
person
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, confrontations
become
Suggestion
becomes
 easier when it is not done face to face. Most of us find it difficult to confront a
person
Use synonyms
 about their misdemeanour in
person
Use synonyms
, fearing
embarassment
the shame you feel when your inadequacy or guilt is made public
embarrassment
.
However
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, by leaving a text message stating our dissatisfaction,
this
Linking Words
 difficult situation can be
overcomed
win a victory over
overcome
.
Also
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, by reaching out
online we
Accept comma addition
online, we
 get to save time.
This
Linking Words
 is because through online
communcation
the activity of communicating; the activity of conveying information
communication
communications
, we do not have to travel to a decided place
of
Suggestion
to
 meet-up, and while text messaging we get
dabble
increase twofold
double
doable
 other other tasks too.
For instance
Linking Words
, one can sweep the house while replying emails. In spite of the above causes, I vehemently believe that virtual communication is a negative development. One serious problem that can be anticipated is depression. After the advent of
internet, many,
Suggestion
the internet, many
the internet, many,
 youngsters
in particular
Linking Words
, are cooped up in their rooms chatting online. As a
results
Suggestion
result
, more time is spent in isolation away from real human interaction which is certainly unhealthy and can bring about depression.
Furthermore
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, communicating online poses a greater deal of risk.
In other words
Linking Words
, people can assume
fake identity
Suggestion
a fake identity
 or hide their true intention of chat. Teenagers especially, who are easily impressionable, can be tricked easily into doing
this
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 they do not want to
such
Linking Words
 as sharing intimate pictures. In conclusion, in
this
Linking Words
 21-
st
Suggestion
St
 century more individuals choose online communication over face-to-face talking as it makes confrontations
simpler
Suggestion
simple
 and saves time.
However
Linking Words
, I strongly feel that
this
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 is a negative development as it can lead to depression
besides
Linking Words
 being very dangerous.

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • social media platforms
  • online interactions
  • virtual communication
  • global community
  • interpersonal skills
  • digital divide
  • cyberspace
  • virtual presence
  • social networking
  • mental wellbeing
  • digital literacy
  • safe spaces
  • marginalized groups
  • face-to-face communication
  • socialisation
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