In many countries, children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong while others consider it as valuable work experience. Discuss both opinions and give your opinion.

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Some countries allow young people to do a paid job in order to gain experience.

This

Linking Words

trend is not taken positively by most people, whereas others advocate children working as it enables the skill set. In my opinion, I firmly believe that adolescent age is for learning formal education rather than focusing on gaining experience.

This

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essay will discuss both views and support my stand.

To begin

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with, in developed countries most of the teenagers do a summer job during their school break,

this

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is not because they need money,

however

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, their purpose is

learing

the cognitive process of acquiring skill or knowledge

learning

. These jobs would not have any pressure and are performed as a fun learning activity,

for example

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, working at

mcdonalds

Suggestion

McDonalds

or being a coast guard. While

on the other hand

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, children are forced to work because of their financial condition in

under developed

relating to societies in which capital needed to industrialize is in short supply

underdeveloped

countries. In

this

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situation young people are often abused to the extreme level and mostly they become

pyschologically

with regard to psychology

psychologically

disturbed.

As a result

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, these kids bring more disturbance in others life,

such

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as gun shooting at school or killing people. Children who obtain a formal education

often turns

Suggestion

often turn

out to be more normal and wise citizens. No matter which place they belong too, after completing

studies they

Accept comma addition

studies, they

can add value and change the country's economical future. There are many organisations globally who would hire a candidate with good educational credential than

Suggestion

experienced person without a degree.

Linking Words

Moreover learning

Accept comma addition

Moreover, learning

can help them to be a civilised human and they would respect gender equality and behaviours which we lack in todays time as our previous generation solely focused on being employed and not being qualified. In conclusion, Some places

entertain

Suggestion

to entertain

child working, whereas some people are

complety

to a complete degree or to the full or entire extent

completely

complete

against it.

Eventhough

Suggestion

Even though

young people are gaining

experiences

Suggestion

experience

and earning money, still they are

too

being one more than one

two

rookie

Suggestion

rookies

to be employed where they are

exploit

Suggestion

exploited

by adults.

Therefore

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, children should not get engaged

Suggestion

paid work and focus on their education.

Submitted by write2navleen on Thu Nov 21 2019

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

322 words

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In many countries, children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong while others consider it as valuable work experience. Discuss both opinions and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

You had to cancel a meeting with a friend. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter apologize for canceling the meeting explain why you couldn't be there suggest an alternative day when you could meet

Some people believe that school children should be made to wear a uniform. Others feel that children should be free to choose their own clothes. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, government should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. What extend do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, teenagers are encouraged to do part-time jobs. What's the situation like in your country? What do yout think are the advantages and disvanatges of doing part-time job

In recent years children have been given more freedom than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give your opinion and examples.