Caring of children is an important thing of the society. It is suggested that all mothers and fathers should be required to take training courses. Do you agree or disagree?

#children #society #mothers #fathers #courses

Nourishment of children in a better way is very crucial in the society. It is considered that all parents must opt training courses of childcare.

However

, I do not agree with

this

statement, and I believe that

instead

of taking training courses, both parents should

engage in

make

efforts for better nourishment of their children at home.

To begin

with, the main reason to support my view is that nowadays, both parents have

became

Suggestion

become

workaholic and they do not have enough free time. If they take training courses of childcare,

then

they feel more burdensome on their mind and

also

after coming from

job

Suggestion

a job

the job

, they have to go for training courses and

Suggestion

during

the whole day they will not get free time to spend with their children.

Consequently

, they will not

engage in

make

any effort to take care about their children.

Therefore

, I think parents should spend time with their children rather than Doing training courses.

Submitted by rajinderwaraich63 on Fri Nov 22 2019

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS writing?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

2 paragraphs

153 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
As time goes by, some countries are developed as fast as lightning. However, it seems that there are also some poor countries which unable to be well developed and it might due to financial problem. This will cause wealthy nations often donate money to less developed nations, yet this does not end poverty. Therefore, despite providing financial aid, wealthier nations ought provide help in the other ways to developing nations. In my opinion, developed countries should utilize other non-motery measures including educational opportunities to eradicate poverty.
5
band
Some people believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health and diet. Others however believe that governments should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Nowadays an increasing number of people are becoming concerned about their health and the quality of their diet. There are two diametrically opposed opinions on the matter. Some people believe that each and every individual is responsible for their own health while others state that it is the government that must ensure that the citizens have healthy eating habits.
6.5
band
Why do some people decide to work after school? Give reasons and solutions for this trend?
It is often argued that these days many students choose to do a part-time job after their classes end, it could be because they want to earn money to support themselves or their education. However, it can be sorted by keeping a check and balance on their working hour and providing them with funds. This essay will discuss these causes and will discuss possible suggestions to overcome them.
7.5
band
Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation,such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money.others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Give your opinion.
In the face of adversity, many people struggle with the question of whether to accept their fate or strive for improvement. While some may argue that it is best to accept a bad situation in order to avoid further hardship, I believe that it is more beneficial to adopt a proactive approach and work towards a better future.
8.5
band
Some people say that the amount of noise that people make should be strictly controlled. Others say that people should be free to make as much noise as they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
There are different views about the effectiveness of making noise should be controlled as opposed to being free in making noise . In my opinion , freedom in making noise is a misconception. In the following ,essay both views will be discussed .

Caring of children is an important thing of the society. It is suggested that all mothers and fathers should be required to take training courses. Do you agree or disagree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health and diet. Others however believe that governments should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Why do some people decide to work after school? Give reasons and solutions for this trend?

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation,such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money.others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Give your opinion.

Some people say that the amount of noise that people make should be strictly controlled. Others say that people should be free to make as much noise as they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.