IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

The restoration of old buildings in major cities around the world costs enormous amounts of money. This money would be better spent on providing new housing and road development. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Preserving the primitive buildings in the prominent urban areas predisposed a plethora of
money
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 all over the globe. Some people argue that rather than spending
money
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 for
this
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, it is better to spend
money
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 for infrastructure developments that are inevitable for a society.
This
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 essay will discuss, why we should spend more
money
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 for development.
First
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 of all, housing is a necessity for a common man after food and fresh air.
In other words
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, we cannot survive in
this
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 world without adequate shelter because, on a day to day basis, it is not easy to stay outside all the time to suffer hot, cold and other calamities and deteriorated environmental factors.
Consequently
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,
government
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 should spend
money
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 for the housing needs of destitute in order to keep them healthy and fresh.
Moreover
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, without proper shelter for their citizens, it shows
government
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's inability to cope with the demanding needs of their people.
For example
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, in some African countries, a lot of people do not have proper shelter that leads to shorter life spans.
Secondly
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,
health
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 should be the top most priority of a
government
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's development plan. In detail, without good
health
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, a nation could not do good things in a long term. So healthy society is always vital for any country to build their economy in the current scenario because, if anything, worse happen to their citizens
such
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 as epidemic diseases, in some situations, it is uncontrollable and may deteriorate the overall
health
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 of a country. So prevention is better than cure, because,
government
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 should spend a plethora of
money
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 for vaccinations that could prevent most of the diseases now a days.
For instance
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, in India, recently a lot of diseases
such
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 as polio were totally eradicated from the country. In conclusion, adequate housing and proper
health
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 care is a must for a healthy society. So I totally agree that authorities should spend the majority of the funds for the needs of housing and
health
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 that are inevitable.

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural heritage
  • Historical significance
  • Urban charm
  • Tourism
  • Revitalizing the economy
  • Aesthetic appeal
  • Environmental sustainability
  • New construction
  • Urban development
  • Infrastructure
  • Cost-effective
  • Long-term benefits
  • Immediate needs
  • Living standards
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