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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

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Helping people of our
society
Use synonyms
gives
Suggestion
give
 immense pleasure to many. Some people have the opinion that the youngsters of the community should spend their free time in working for others free of cost. In my opinion I completely agree with the notion as it benefits to both young individuals and
society
Use synonyms
 by providing more
career
Use synonyms
 opportunity and making the bonds strong among each other respectively.
First
Linking Words
 and foremost, by involving in unpaid
work
Use synonyms
 for the public young people gets the benefits in
career
Use synonyms
 aspects. The extra-curricular activity adds up to the resume and helps to boost the
career
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 opportunities. Beside
this
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, teenagers can able to expand their contacts by socializing with co-workers involved in
such
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 voluntary
work
Use synonyms
 which may help in expanding professional network and job search.
For instance
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, recruiters of famous companies give
weightage
Suggestion
 to the active involvement of
candidate
Suggestion
candidate's
 social responsibility
work
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 in hiring process.
Hence
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
work
Use synonyms
 helps in the
career
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 for young people.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, free
work
Use synonyms
 done by the young individuals of the
society
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 helps in building strong bonds among elders and youngsters of the community.
In addition
Linking Words
 to that, interaction and understanding increases when young ones
work
Use synonyms
 for and children.
Moreover
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,
their
in or at that place
there
 will be more peace, happiness, and harmony among individuals which leads to
happy and peaceful nation
Suggestion
the happy and peaceful nation
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, when children participate in
such
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 social cause during free
time
Accept comma addition
time, then
then
Linking Words
 the relationships among
whole community
Suggestion
a whole community
 grows healthy. In conclusion, I think
young
Suggestion
the younger
younger
 generation participating in social responsibility
Use synonyms
work
Suggestion
works
 free of cost helps both the
society
Use synonyms
 and to themselves as well. It helps adults with more job opportunities and strong development of nation with peace and harmony.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • required
  • unpaid
  • community work
  • benefit
  • teenagers
  • life skills
  • volunteering
  • empathy
  • compassion
  • socially aware
  • responsible
  • interact
  • diverse backgrounds
  • cultural understanding
  • tolerance
  • work experience
  • essential skills
  • employment
  • interests
  • passions
  • career development
  • contribute
  • betterment
  • development
  • local community
  • mental well-being
  • stress
  • self-esteem
  • burden
  • academic
  • personal lives
  • time management
  • support
  • balance
  • participate
  • encouraged
  • numerous benefits
  • individuals
  • conclusion
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