Nowadays, some parents pressure their children to be successful. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development

#parents #pressure #children #development

It is clear that, the parents want their children to win their career. So they approach their children in different ways. Some of them put pressure on their kids to fulfil their dreams. In my opinion,

this

situation leads to a negative development in the future of their children. On the one hand, there are so many positive reasons for parents. Most of them want their children to reach a high position in their job.

Also

, the career they will choose would be the best for their financial stability in their future life.

Moreover

, they didn't want their children to struggle in their life. Because most of the parents came from poor background and by their hard work they can fulfil their child's needs.

On the other hand

, some of them want to show off in the society.

Thus

, sending their kids to the expensive school or college and giving large amount of donation.

For instance

, my cousin brother like into playing musical instruments than his studies. But his parents discourage him and send him to school

boarding

Suggestion

boards

Therefore

this

situation leads them to be a person who cannot express their own ideas and desires.

Thus

, they didn't get satisfaction in their career and spoil their life to

fulfill

put in effect

fulfil

their

parents

Suggestion

parents'

needs. Because all parents want to be proud of their

children

Suggestion

child's

children's

achievement by telling it to others and showing how successful children they have brought up. In conclusion, parents should provide their children with the freedom to decide on their own future.

Otherwise

, it gives a negative impact on the behaviour and feelings of children.

Submitted by elby.navarch on Tue Nov 26 2019

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

266 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays, some parents pressure their children to be successful. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

It has been claimed that workers over 50 are not resposilbe to rapidly changing ideas in the modern workplace and that for this reason younger workers are to be preferred. To what extend to you agree or disagree?

Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists rather than local people. Why is this? What can be done to encourage local people to visit museums and historical sites?

Should we invent a new language for people from different countries to use for the international communication? Do you think there are more benefits or more problems with it? Explain.