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Writing Samples
Band 5

Most people agree that money cannot bring happiness. Why is happiness difficult to define?

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A common belief of the people is that happiness cannot be bought
eventhough
Suggestion
even though
 you are the richest
person
Use synonyms
 in the world.
However
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, some are of the opinion that if a
person
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 has enough
money
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 it would live a
fruitfull
productive or conducive to producing in abundance
fruitful
life
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. In my opinion, I tend to agree that we cannot buy joy in the
life
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.
To begin
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 with, the
money
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 does not always answer every problem in a
person
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's
life
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. We come
accross
to the opposite side
across
 many individuals
that is
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 quite rich
such
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 as our bosses in the work places. Yet, when we really get to know them, we see that some of them are not
enjoing
derive or receive pleasure from; get enjoyment from; take pleasure in
enjoying
 the
life
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 as much as we do.
That is
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 because they might
having
Suggestion
have
 some problems that their wealth could not solve.
For example
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, anyone could not find an individual who
truly love
Suggestion
truly loves
 him or her with the
money
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.
Hence
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, important aspects of the
life
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such
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 as love, loyalty are always impossible to buy. If a
person
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 does not have
good
Suggestion
a good life partner
good life partner
life
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 patner, relatives and friend more often than not it is going to have a
missrable
very unhappy; full of misery
miserable
life
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.
On the other hand
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, happiness of the
life
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 is closely related to the inner peace of ourselves. Personal qualities and traits sometimes
effect
have an effect upon
affect
 our
joyfullness
the emotion of great happiness
joyfulness
 in the
life
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.
Jelousy
Suggestion
Jealousy
 and
heatreard
the emotion of intense dislike; a feeling of dislike so strong that it demands action
hatred
 are
siginificant
important in effect or meaning
significant
 factors when it comes to
this
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 side of the
life
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. If we could not be happy about our coworkers,
neigbours
a person who lives (or is located) near another
neighbours
 or friends.
Then
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 we would
endup
Suggestion
end up
 having a
faily
to a moderately sufficient extent or degree
fairly
 unhappy
life
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. Because
wthout
in absence of
without
konwing
evidencing the possession of inside information
knowing
 we
cought
discover or come upon accidentally, suddenly, or unexpectedly; catch somebody doing something or in a certain state
caught
fought
ought
 with the rat race in order to compete with those people. Due to the competitive lifestyle of the most people today they find it difficult to enjoy and be happy. In conclusion, our personal qualities, the way we face the
life
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 and people around us are the facts that
makes
Suggestion
make
 us happy in
this
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life
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,
money
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 does not do anything for that.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • subjective
  • universally
  • cultural differences
  • psychological factors
  • satisfaction with life
  • emotional balance
  • personal achievements
  • social connections
  • fulfilling relationships
  • sense of belonging
  • sense of purpose
  • physical health
  • well-being
  • financial stability
  • mindfulness
  • gratitude
  • positive thinking
What to do next:
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