For some people, the ideal holiday is to get away from their normal routine by staying in a hotel or camping in a countryside. Others prefer to stay at home and do things they do not normally have time for. What do you think are the benefits of going away on holidays? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #holiday #hotel #countryside #home #time #holidays

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In the modern world, travelling abroad has become a popular activity among the citizens.

However

, there are some

type

Fix the agreement mistake

types

show examples

people

who prefer staying at home

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and spending days with family and friends. After pondering these phenomena, I believe that being in foreign

countries

will definitely expand peoples' horizons. In

this

regard, holidays in other

countries

have more advantages than staying at home. First and foremost, travelling abroad is useful for personal growth and learning about another culture. During the holidays, tourists get to know popular places in the world and popular tourist destinations.

Moreover

this

kind of

trips

Fix the agreement mistake

trip

show examples

may suggest various kinds of activities, leading to

have

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

some pleasure time. To illustrate,

peoples

Fix the agreement mistake

people

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

Western

countries

may have a chance to explore breathtaking

view

Fix the agreement mistake

views

show examples

of mountains and

unspoilt

Correct article usage

the unspoilt

show examples

nature of wildlife in the East.

Accordingly

people

living in the East can enjoy the futuristic buildings of developed

countries

. Another important advantage of travelling on a trip is experience and knowledge. In

this

case, many

people

can gather information about the regions.

Consequently

, their horizons would be developed.

In addition

, travellers can bring some memorabilia for themselves and some presents for family and relatives.

However

, spending time at home may be beneficial for those who prefer being close to family members and communicating with them. In conclusion,

although

many

people

reckon to think that travelling is

time consuming

Add a hyphen

time-consuming

show examples

and boring, personally, I believe that it offers many opportunities for touring.

In addition

this

, it will be useful to watch other

countries

Submitted by nur_31.05_kz on Thu Dec 05 2019

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

253 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

perspective
foster
broaden
creativity
well-being
memories
disconnecting
presence
educational
adventure
stress-reduction
quality time
outdoor activities
digital detox
historical insights

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Some people believe that it is more important to teach children the literature of their own country than other countries. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think advertisements control what we purchase, while others think they are useful sources of information on products. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

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Although abuse of the system is inevitable, social welfare payments are essential to protect the rights that citizens have to a guaranteed minimum income in a democratic society. Do you agree or disagree?