Nowadays, young people communicate with friends and family mostly through social networking sites, rather than other ways of communication like talking on the phone or face to face. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#people #friends #sites #communication #phone #face #development

In the past few

years

Add a comma

years,

show examples

social

media

websites and apps

such

Facebook

and Twitter have become hugely popular with the youth.

While

using these

sites

has many benefits

such

as being efficient and enjoyable, they

also

have a few drawbacks which

overall

makes

Correct subject-verb agreement

make

show examples

this

development a bad one. Using apps like

Facebook

and Twitter

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

a convenient and fun way to talk with

friends

and family members.

Instead

of phoning someone and hoping they aren’t busy, sending messages through these apps can be a better option as the person can receive the notification when they are free and respond in a timely manner.

Also

, most

people

are very busy these days so often can’t answer their

phone

Fix the agreement mistake

phones

show examples

or meet

friends

for a coffee or

face to

Add a hyphen

face-to-face

show examples

face

chat. By using Twitter and similar

sites

, we can still keep in touch with our

friends

often even if they are far away. These

sites

are often enjoyable to use as well.

In addition

to chatting, we can send pictures, videos and funny messages to our

friend

Fix the agreement mistake

friends

show examples

, which strengthen friendship bonds and

thus

lead to better relationships.

However

, there are negative aspects of using social

sites

as the main way to communicate and I believe these far outweigh the benefits mentioned above.

First,

if we only chat using these

sites

we can lose our ability to interact well with others

face

This

can cause

people

to feel depressed, lonely and have mental issues as

human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

show examples

are inherently social creatures who need more interaction than social

media

sites

provide.

Furthermore

, the type of interaction is not intimate. When we meet

face

-to-

face

, we can really feel the emotions of others and can connect strongly resulting in far stronger relationships.

However

, via social

media

Add a comma

media,

show examples

the interaction is far colder and can result in artificial relationships.

For instance

, many

people

have 500 plus

Facebook

friends

but they don’t actually know these

people

well or ever meet them for a coffee or meal.

Thus

, these types of

friends

and interactions are not sufficient and surely not

Change the article

show examples

adequate replacement for

face to

Add a hyphen

face-to-face

show examples

face

meetings. To close,

while

there are some benefits of social

sites

such

as being convenient and fun to use, we should not ignore the

drawback

Fix the agreement mistake

drawbacks

show examples

discussed above. I recommend that

people

make sure to communicate with their loved ones via the phone and in person not only via social

media

sites

Facebook

Submitted by arthurwong4.0 on Fri Dec 06 2019

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

401 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
Multinational companies are becoming increasingly common in developing countries. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?
Certain people believe that multinational companies are becoming more common in advance countries, because these companies provide pure and certified products from the relevant government. It is also a good opportunity to provide same product on same prices in many countries. Multinational companies badly effect the local market and their product of the concerned country.
<4
band
The exploration and development of safe alternatives to fossil fuels should be the most important global priority today.
It is true that fossil fuels safe alternatives exploration and development is should give more priority in world because of its non-renewable ability. I totally agree with this given statement.
7.5
band
Some people say that the main environmental problem in our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Other say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both sides of these views and give your own opinion.
It is often said that the major environmental problem in our era is the extinction of plants and wildlife. However, this issue is not entirely straightforward, and in other states, we face more serious issues. in my opinion, the extinction of special species of biota is important but we are confronting some more important environmental problems like global warming. I will discuss both sides of the debate and give my view in the following.
5
band
Overpopulation is the cause of number of problems, especially in urban areas. What are its causes? What are its effects?
Nowadays our society is experiencing a large number of issues and one of them is the gigantic number of people living in the same area, especially in the cities. The present essay will explain the situation well as the factors that generated it and consequences.
8
band
"Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?"
An increasing number of people nowadays choose to work for themselves instead of working for other companies because the more and more young generation is looking for more freedom in their life. However, I believed that the main disadvantages of this flexible working style are lack of income stability and the effect on self-growth.

Nowadays, young people communicate with friends and family mostly through social networking sites, rather than other ways of communication like talking on the phone or face to face. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Multinational companies are becoming increasingly common in developing countries. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

The exploration and development of safe alternatives to fossil fuels should be the most important global priority today.

Some people say that the main environmental problem in our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Other say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both sides of these views and give your own opinion.

Overpopulation is the cause of number of problems, especially in urban areas. What are its causes? What are its effects?

"Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?"