Over the past fifty years, international sports events such as Olympic games and world cup competition have played an increasing important role in our society. However, many people think such events are an enormous waste of money, time and effort. Do you agree?

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Some people believe that it is irrelevant to organise global events

such

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as the Olympics and they

also

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, say that it is not viable. I completely disagree with argument as, I believe that hosting

such

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events on a global scale will provide a fair share and

additionally

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it can aid in sustaining the

world

Use synonyms

peace. Everyone should be given equal rights to participate, so they too can shine among powerful nations.

In other words

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, sports events

such

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as Olympics,

world

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cups can give all of the nations around the

world

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the opportunity to compete and

as a result

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this

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can open doors for them to get the recognition they deserve.

For example

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; Usain bolt

otherwise

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known as the fastest man on earth was a Jamaican born,

hence

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now the whole

world

Use synonyms

regards Jamaica as a country which produces some of the worlds best athletes. If done with good intentions larger gatherings can always create peace between nations. To put differently, we have all seen the horrors of wars between nations and detrimental repercussions that comes along with them,

therefore

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an event

such

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as the Olympics can create unity between countries resulting in peace. For an example; we have observed and feel that the diplomatic ties between the USA and Russia is not firm,

however

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last

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Olympics held in Russia showed us that participants between these two countries come together to win a peaceful war of a gold medal. In conclusion, I believe that hosting events on a global level must be continued, as

this

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would help countries to build better diplomatic relationships.

Furthermore

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, it will

also

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give less powerful nations the opportunity to participate and the recognition.

Sat Dec 07 2019

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13
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

277 words

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Many companies sponsor sports as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think this is good for the world of sports, while others think there are disadvantages of this. Discuss both sides and give your opinion