Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than any other important professionals. Some people think it is justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some sports bring a lot of

money

to famous sports stars who are globally or regionally renown. Now, the

money

involved in

this

profession paid to these superstars sparks an ongoing debate when compared with the earning of other valuable professionals.

Consequently

, both the thoughts require a careful analysis as they both have some valid reason before my personal view finalizes the discussion. On the one hand, people who follow sports believe that sports stars

not only have

Suggestion

don't only have

talent but

Accept comma addition

talent, but

also

, a shorter career span. They need to show their talent to the world in a limited amount of time as their career span is not as long as other professionals have. A famous former cricket player, Shahid Afridi, a globally known cricketer, announced his retirement at the age of 38. So the hefty amount he earned during his career is now and in future will be useful for him and his family.

Hence

, sporting stars like him deserve mega earnings.

On the other hand

, there is another school of thought that rejects the idea of rewarding sports superstars a lot of

money

because of these reasons. At the outset, there are other many important professionals in every country, who reach to their success, not in leaps and

bounds but

Accept comma addition

bounds, but

after years of education and working experience, do not earn more than sporting figures.

Last

but not least, sports are just entertainment and a country can survive without it or the

entertainers but

Accept comma addition

entertainers, but

not without many important professionals who make a great contribution to progressive society. Professionals

such

as, surgeons, engineers, scientists, arm personnel, professionals, and politicians are among those who deserve

such

a hefty amount of

money

against their pivotal roles, not entertainers.

Therefore

, I

also

consider it unfair to reward a lot of

money

to sports stars and ignore other valuable professionals. When professionals like me do not earn what they deserve, the only option left open for them is to migrate to a country for better earnings. I hope that society will change their priorities and value other vital professionals than sports stars.

Submitted by shayanfeb80 on Sun Dec 08 2019

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

346 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than any other important professionals. Some people think it is justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

some people say history is one of the most important School subjects.other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Creative artists should always be given the freedom to express their own ideas (in words, pictures, music or film) in whichever way they wish. There should be no government restriction on what they do To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In many governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?