Some people believe, it is important to spend more time developing a successful career, while others believe it is important to spend time with family and friends. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #time #career #friends

It is believed, by a few number of people that to construct a flourishing profession one must devote most of their hours to build it.

By contrast

, some person thinks that giving time to family and friends is more significant than the course. I opine, both the perspectives are equally important because work and life always move parallel. To commence,

firstly

, due to the rapid increase in technology and IT sector, the people are focused more on the thriving profession rather than spending time outside with relatives. To illustrate, a survey result revealed that 90% of the total population were indulged in double shifts or working for extended hours either to earn more or to get the vistas of knowledge.

Additionally

this

may lead them to have a course of their choice.

Secondly

, competition had adversely raised the standards and

therefore

, an individual is concentrating more and more on developing his skills.

Furthermore

, they are forced to put their mind and soul to achieve a specific height. On the flip side, studies of the NGOs had discussed a major issues related to family matters. They said the youth of the nation are blindly following the emerging trends of IT industries, which had certainly affected their family relations. Nowadays, people are admitting their parents in the old age home because they do not have enough time to look after and

moreover

, quite busy in accomplishing their work assignments. To introspect, a workshop was conducted to impart the knowledge in work-life balance, which was a huge success and people understood the difference between the work and the personal space. To conclude, a flourishing profession could be achieved by developing an interest to maintain the equilibrium in workplace and household tasks.

Hence

, an individual can maximize its abilities in order to formulate a thriving future by sharing some hours with loved ones.

Submitted by jagvir.bbsbec on Wed Dec 11 2019

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
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Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

309 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe, it is important to spend more time developing a successful career, while others believe it is important to spend time with family and friends. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

nowadays, the quality of life in large cities is decreasing. why. what can be done to tackle this?

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

The best way to remove poverty in developing countries is to provide 6 years of free education to all children. So that they can read, write and use numbers agree or disagree

More and more people are using the internet to do their tasks rather than doing in person. Does the advantage of this trend outweigh the disadvantege?

Some people believe the primary purpose of museums is to entertain people, while others believe their purpose is to educate. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.