IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters such as food, clothes and entertainment is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matter that affect them. discuss both these views and give your opinion.

#people #children #choices #matters #food #clothes #entertainment #society #individuals #decisions #matter
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it
Suggestion
It
 is good to show children leaving a freedom environment because it could help children to grow stronger and confident.
but
Suggestion
But
 it depends on the age of a child.
Linking Words
for
Suggestion
For
 example little children cannot use clothes and they
also
Linking Words
 like to eat sweets all the time. When
tje
definite article
the
 children
is
Suggestion
are
 free to their choices they could make mistakes so parents should not dictate children what want but guide to the path.
For
Linking Words
example most
Accept comma addition
example, most
 parents in western world teach their children
arguiy
present reasons and arguments
argue
again
 rather than
smagging
catch on a snag
snagging
smuggling
 when they do something wrong when children are thought to their own choice could easily manage the affairs when grow up. Children may sometimes give a good opinion so that it is good to understand rather than upsetting them many parents in Africa do not believe
of
Suggestion
to
 listen children
that is
Linking Words
 cause many African children become vandals and aggressors toward the community.
if
Suggestion
If
 we teach our youngster to determine their own
choices they
Accept comma addition
choices, they
 will show respect to their add community in its general because they never felt depressed and they would not to bother
to
Suggestion
with
 any when they get older.
overall
Suggestion
Overall
 when we
listen
perceive (sound) via the auditory sense
hear
 our children that we make their future personality better parents respect children some like adults when the children try to refuse children something they should justify to them why there is fuse explain to them
reasons
Suggestion
the reasons
.
Submitted by englishcoaching772 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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