In many countries the level of crime is increasing and crimes are becoming more violent. Why do you think this is and what can be done about it?

#countries #level #crime #crimes

Nowadays there seems to be an

increase

in the

crime

rate and particularly most crimes are becoming more violent than before. There are several factors linked to

this

and quite a number of solutions will be put forward.

Firstly

, the high rates of unemployment can be seen as the major reason why crimes are constantly on an

increase

. Youth's now have no jobs or something engaging

them thereby

Accept comma addition

them, thereby

making them turn to

crime

as an alternative.

Also

with the easy access to drugs has caused teenagers to become more violent than ever before. Another interesting factor is the breakdown of the family unit which is common these days. Most males do not have their father's as

role model

Suggestion

a role model

role models

and

subsequently

turn to

crime

Thus

unemployment and lack of a family structure all contribute to the

increase

crimes

Suggestion

crime

rates. One of the most significant change that can be put in place is to create jobs or opening of a community

center

an area that is approximately central within some larger region

centre

for teenagers and youths. When kid's are engaged with something productive they would hardly have time to commit or engage in illegal activities.

addition families

Accept comma addition

addition, families

needs to put in more efforts in the upbringing of their offsprings as

this

will help them become responsible citizens later in life. In conclusion, high unemployment rates and

breakdown

Suggestion

the breakdown

of the family unit are several causes for

increase

crime

and

creation

Suggestion

the creation

of jobs

Accept space

more commitment from relatives are some of the possible

solution

Suggestion

solutions

Suggestion

for

tackling these issues.

Sat Dec 14 2019

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

244 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

crime rate
violent crimes
socioeconomic factors
law enforcement
technology
education
employment
drug abuse
alcohol abuse
poverty
inequality
effectiveness
investing
job creation
social support
community engagement

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In many countries the level of crime is increasing and crimes are becoming more violent. Why do you think this is and what can be done about it?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In today’s world of advanced science and technology, we still greatly value our artists such as musicians, painters and writers. What can art tell us about life that science and technology cannot?

The development of toursim contributed to English becoming the most prominent language in the world. Some people think this will lead to English become the only language to be spoken globally. What are the advantages and disadvantages to having one language in the world?

Some people believe that tourism promotes the economy while other argue that tourism destroy the environment. Discuss both views and give your oppinion

The rise of remote work has allowed many employees to work from anywhere in the world. However, this trend also presents some challenges.

Nowadays, many people have to work longer hours, and they feel more stressed out than before. What are the reasons? What can employers do to make their employees' lives easier?