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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think sending criminals to prison is not an effective way to deal with them. Education and training are better. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #criminals #prison #education
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Imprisonment has been a popular and traditional method to fight crimes for centuries, but recently it has been challenged by the fact that
this
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 method does not work in some cases. While many people are persuaded that disciplining criminals through education and training is a better alternative to reduce crimes, I disagree with
this
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 sentiment to a certain degree. I believe that prison, at some points, still has an important role in the criminal justice system. In
this
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 essay, I will give some arguments to support my ideas. There are two reasons why I partly concur with the statement that sending outlaws to jail still provides several benefits to the common people.
First
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 and foremost, some individuals are born violent who cannot redeem themselves merely through studying and
thus
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 should be removed from their normal lives to avoid
further
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 harm. In the history of criminal profiling and criminology, criminologists have discovered a consistent pattern summarized from many cases of real-life serial killers.
This
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 pattern showed that many infamous serial killers,
such
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 as Monte Rissell or Ed Kemper, were sent to mental institutions for educating purpose and successfully convinced their
counselors
a member of a council
councillors
 that they were getting well.
As a result
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, these dangerous criminals were released back to society and went on a murder spree, reported committing more crimes. They only stopped killing people when being incarcerated for life sentences in correctional facilities.
Moreover
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, many victims or families' victims do not believe that the offenders deserve redemption, so they would seek vengeance on their own with brutal methods which would create endless vendettas.
Conversely
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, it must be said that the aforementioned arguments do not apply to every situation.
Firstly
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, incarceration is not suitable for all types of criminal offences, especially juvenile crimes or those who do not receive a life sentence. Being isolated from the community for a while with no academic certificates or proper professions, by the time the offenders are released from prison, they are no longer qualified to work and discriminated against by other people in their community due to their shady past, despite still being at their working age.
Consequently
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, these offenders will struggle to reintegrate back into society and are easily tempted to go back to commit illegal acts. According to statistics, over 75% of
released
Suggestion
releasing
 prisoners are rearrested within five years of being released from the criminal justice system. A better solution, in
this
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 case, would be to train and educate criminals, rather than locking them behind bars.
Furthermore
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, establishing educational programs for criminals without arresting them will prevent the disruption of the economic system, reduce the loss of the employment market and create more opportunities for these kinds of people to right their wrongs and
finally
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 become a productive person in their communities. In conclusion, the question about the efficiency of imprisonment and pedagogy as a better alternative is contentious with no easy answers. To my mind, the confinement of unlawful individuals gives a lot of benefits in reducing outlawed activities and ensuring the safety of each citizen. In the end, imprisonment is still the most effective way to deal with criminals and satisfy the victims’ desire for retribution under the authority of the state. But the states should try to introduce new ways to fight crimes
such
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 as education and training to achieve better results,
instead
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 of relying too much on the incarceration, which still has flaws.
Submitted by letrananhthu222 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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