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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph shows the information about international conferences in three capital cities in 1980 – 2010

The graph shows the information about international conferences in three capital cities in 1980 – 2010
The line graph compares the
number
Use synonyms
 of international
conferences
Use synonyms
 held in three different capital cities during the
year
Use synonyms
 1980 to 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of
conferences
Use synonyms
 held in
City
Use synonyms
 A and
City
Use synonyms
 B
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
gradually decreased.
However
Linking Words
, in
City
Use synonyms
 C a rapid increase in organizing international
conferences
Use synonyms
 can be seen until the
year
Use synonyms
 2000.
Initially
Linking Words
, in the
year
Use synonyms
 1980, both
the
Correct article usage
apply
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cities were organizing
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 different
number
Use synonyms
 of international
conferences
Use synonyms
, 35 in
City
Use synonyms
 A and 30 in
City
Use synonyms
 B.
However
Linking Words
, a rapid change between
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 two cities can be seen in organizing
conferences
Use synonyms
 until 2005 when they both held an equal
number
Use synonyms
 of
conferences
Use synonyms
,
that is
Linking Words
 around 27. Interestingly, by the end of the period,
City
Use synonyms
 B has organized more events than
City
Use synonyms
 A, 26 and 24 respectively.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
City
Use synonyms
 C had not organized any international conference in the
year
Use synonyms
 1980,
this
Linking Words
city
Use synonyms
 seeing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
number
Use synonyms
 20, in the total
number
Use synonyms
 of meetings in the
year
Use synonyms
 1990.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 growth is
further
Linking Words
 extended until the
year
Use synonyms
 2000 when
City
Use synonyms
 C
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
organized the highest
number
Use synonyms
 of
conferences
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 (35), after that, by the end of the period they organized a total of around 31
such
Linking Words
conferences
Use synonyms
 marking them the topmost hosting
city
Use synonyms
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, conferences, year, city with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 6 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "rapid" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • international conferences
  • capital cities
  • trend
  • fluctuates
  • dominates
  • peak
  • trough
  • significant
  • increase
  • decrease
  • periods
  • data representation
  • interpretation
  • measure
  • y-axis
  • x-axis
  • comparative analysis
  • statistical figures
  • conclusion
  • summary
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