‌2. As a result of electronic inventions such as computer and tv , people do less physical activity,and this is having a negative effect on their health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#inventions #computer #tv #people #activity #effect #health

Due to the invention of various technological advancements

such

as the computer, television and even the internet, studies have shown that individuals are less active physically and clearly

Accept space

this

can lead to a negative impact on the health of the individual. Personally, I agree with the above statement wholeheartedly. On most occasions, individuals tend to gravitate towards the use of these technologies rather than do physical activities and commit to a healthier lifestyle. Before the invention of these technologies, individuals were left with no other option than to resort to physical activities to occupy their free times. In the 1800s, taking long walks was a very popular activity among both the gentry and the commoners. It is sad to say that

this

is the situation we see ourselves in. The only way

foward

at or to or toward the front

forward

would be to work with what we have.

This

is the era of technologies and in order to engage the individuals physically, it is important to combine these two worlds.

For example

, the invention of fit watches and pedometers encourages the person to be more active whilst still connected to technology

Submitted by niccibarnz on Sun Dec 22 2019

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

183 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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‌2. As a result of electronic inventions such as computer and tv , people do less physical activity,and this is having a negative effect on their health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

High school students are usually not good at managing money. What are the reasons? What are the solutions?

Some people think it is more important to plant more tree in open areas in towns and cities than provide more housing. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Shortage of houses has become a severe problem in the cities today and only the government can solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this.

In some countries the average weight of people increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing