IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Why local people do not visit the historical site and museums. Discuss the reasons and give a solution to this problem.

#people #visit #site #museums
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There is no doubt that ancient buildings are the backbone of nation that represent the rich culture and diversity of any country.It is uprising issue in
today
Suggestion
today's
todays
 world, the native people of historical city rarely goes to museums
beacsue
for the reason that; on account of
because
to
Suggestion
of
 their daily schedule and they do not give much preference to historical places.
This
Linking Words
 essay will explain the main causes and solution of
problem
Suggestion
the problem
problems
a problem
To begin
Linking Words
 with, Ancient sites always attract foreign people from different cities and countries by past
,
Accept space
,
culture and speciality. People from other nations always want to
visit
Use synonyms
 these kinds of
places but
Accept comma addition
places, but
its
it is
it's
 totally opposite to the native people they try to deny the importance of old buildings because they already know about them from books and their parents so they
dont
do not
don't
 show much
intrust
Suggestion
in trust
. A study shows that natives of Agra city rarely
visit
Use synonyms
 The Taj Mahal.
Furthermore
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, there is
plethora
Suggestion
a plethora
 of solutions that overcome
this
Linking Words
 problem. By aware the local people regarding the rich culture of their cities and buildings that encourage them to
visit
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 places and
also
Linking Words
 make them more
resposible
worthy of or requiring responsibility or trust; or held accountable
responsible
 to save the wealth of their city and country.A study shows that people of
india
a republic in the Asian subcontinent in southern Asia; second most populous country in the world; achieved independence from the United Kingdom in 1947
India
pays
Suggestion
pay
 more attention regarding the security of ancient buildings than before. To conclude
,
Accept space
,
due to
busy scheduel
Suggestion
the busy schedule
busy schedule
 of native people they
dont
do not
don't
 like to
visit
Use synonyms
 their local old buildings
also
Linking Words
 they know everything about that
buildings
Suggestion
building
 so
thay
people in general
they
dont
do not
don't
 feel need to
visit
Use synonyms
.
but
Suggestion
But
 these reasons never overcome the importance of ancient
sities
the piece of land on which something is located (or is to be located)
sites
cities
 for foreigners and people of other cities.
Submitted by babybrar2020 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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