IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

As housing is a basic need for people, government should provide free housing for everyone who cant't afford it, To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#people #government #cant
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Nowadays, the cost of homes is increasing at an alarming rate. The apartments are a basic necessity for individuals,
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
 country's officials should give free accommodation, for each and everyone who cannot bear it.
This
Linking Words
 essay will argue, why the higher authorities should grant a free place to stay for
people
Use synonyms
 who can't afford it.
To begin
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 with, the government collects taxes from the citizens of the country. The responsibility lies in officials to look after the
people
Use synonyms
 of the country
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and make sure that nobody is left homeless. They should build new buildings to accommodate
people
Use synonyms
 who cannot buy
such
Linking Words
 expensive properties.
For example
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, a survey report submitted by the India
times
Capitalize word
Times
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 states that in Hyderabad the new government have constructed various lofty buildings in different places for those whose
earning
Fix the agreement mistake
earnings
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is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 below 50,000 yearly. In
this
Linking Words
 way, the regime can prove to be a valuable asset to the public in need of
such
Linking Words
 homes.
In contrast
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, both men and women, irrespective of their caste,
religion
Correct word choice
or religion
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 give votes to the authority of the nation, believing that they will do something better for them, and provide them with employment, better standards of living etc.
A
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
People
Use synonyms
 belonging to the poverty section, hope that the ruling judiciary will benefit them, and their children,
such
Linking Words
 as giving their little ones free education and a spacious flat for them to live in given to them under a provisioned scheme by the
ministry
Capitalize word
Ministry
show examples
 of the
republic
Capitalize word
Republic
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
, a report submitted by
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 Chinese newspaper states that the ruling party in China has allotted 80 3bhk flats to the poor
people
Use synonyms
 including
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
all amenities under a family scheme. Other kingdoms should
also
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 follow China and implement
this
Linking Words
 law to make a better place for underprivileged communities as a whole.
To conclude
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,
this
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 essay
argued
Wrong verb form
argues
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 why the low-paid tribes should be given personal housing
along with
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other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
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 virtues who cannot
buy
Verb problem
find
show examples
 these modern lavish homes to dwell in.
According to
Linking Words
 my judgement, underpaid
people
Use synonyms
 should be given housing boards by the executives of the land who require a proper place of residence.
Submitted by ahsan123490 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, some ideas may need more development to fully support the argument.
task achievement
The response addresses the prompt by discussing the need for the government to provide free housing for those who cannot afford it. To improve, provide more in-depth analysis and explore counterarguments.
coherence cohesion
Clear introduction and conclusion present
task achievement
Specific examples provided to support the argument

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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