Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having money a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy.

People always desire happiness. They keep looking for something to make their
life
greater. High percentages of people choose
money
that makes them happy. Sometimes I
also
think my
life
could be more beautiful if I have lots of
money
. According to
importance
Suggestion
the importance
of
money
is getting higher and it is
nassasary
absolutely essential
necessary
to live in modern society, people want to have
money
as much as they can. In my country, some people try to keep
save
Suggestion
saving
money
until they satisfy. Because people feel safe and comfortable in everywhere if they have lots of
money
. Obviously they believe
this
stable feeling
obviously make
Suggestion
obviously makes
them happy. Some people say that
money
can do everything. It means that people can do what they want to do if they have
money
. If they have lots of
money
, it
become
Suggestion
becomes
large selection.
Therefore people
Accept comma addition
Therefore, people
, especially young people think
money
is the best that make their
life
happier.
However
, there are
variety
Suggestion
varying
varied
methods for our happy lives. Recently, 'YOLO' syndrome
is
Suggestion
has been
popular in the world which means you only live once.
This
campaign made for people who work too hard and ignore their own
life
. YOLO changed
people
Suggestion
peoples
mind and they
stated
take the first step or steps in carrying out an action
started
finding what makes them smile. Someone
focus
Suggestion
focuses
focusses
on their
heath
a healthy state of wellbeing free from disease
health
, someone
enjoy
Suggestion
enjoys
traveling
the act of going from one place to another
travelling
or some people have learned other languages. I
also
have learned knitting. Due to people found these
activies
any specific behavior
activities
by themselves and enjoy, they feel more achieve and
happy
Suggestion
happiness
. Happiness is always beside us. It could be our hobbies or
relexing
affording physical or mental rest
relaxing
on the couch. I think that
happinese
state of well-being characterized by emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy
happiness
is closer to us or far from us as how we think our lives by ourselves.
Submitted by piaosola on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Financial security
  • Basic needs
  • Comfort
  • Luxury
  • Freedom
  • Altruistic
  • Philanthropy
  • Nurturing relationships
  • Fulfillment
  • Sense of accomplishment
  • Physical well-being
  • Spiritual beliefs
  • Community involvement
  • Gratitude
  • Mindfulness
  • Simple pleasures
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