Governments around the world spend too much money on treating illnesses and diseases and not enough on health education and prevention. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#governments #world #money #illnesses #diseases #health #education #prevention

I strongly agree that at present governments provide more funds on treating diseases and

illnesses and

Accept comma addition

illnesses, and

allocate minimal funds on health education and prevention. I think it is more effective to increase the budget in designing programs that aims to teach the importance of healthy lifestyle to prevent major diseases.

Government

should use the funds to make various platforms in educating the public

Suggestion

about

the causes of various diseases and how it could be prevented. I believe if the

government

will have community based activities related to healthy lifestyle it will help decrease the percentage of people with medical ailment. Programs

such

as sex education subject should be part of the curriculum in secondary schools. At present, there

are

Suggestion

an increase of person diagnosed with the disease and it continues to rise due to ignorance of the public. Prevention is the best cure. It is cost efficient to formulate preventive programs than to invest and purchase medicines and equipments.

Furthermore

government

should focus more on people and how to

further

develop their knowledge and awareness. I believe that if people powered with knowledge of what causes a disease will surely increase percentage of people living a healthy life. I think

this

approach is good for

long term

Suggestion

the long term

. In summary,

government

Suggestion

the government

allocate

Suggestion

allocates

more funds on medicines and medical equipments more rather than to portion a higher budget in promoting health education and prevention. I strongly agree that

its

it is

it's

about time for the

government

to use a much

effective

Suggestion

more effective

way to solve the issues

Suggestion

healthcare

Suggestion

health care

Submitted by babe.chotirawee on Thu Jan 02 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS writing?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

254 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.5

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
A family has a great influence on children's development, but the outside of home plays a bigger role in it. Do you agree or disagree?
Families play a crucial role in their children growing process, but on the other hand, various external factors have a huge impact on children’s behaviour and characters. So, it seems that the outside environment is a key element in this process.
4
band
The picture given depicts the spending of The United Kingdom and France in 2010 on several commodities.
The picture given depicts the spending of The United Kingdom and France in 2010 on several commodities.
7
band
In many nations , only a minority of young people are willing to do unpaid community service . There are many arguments that shows many negative outcomes because of this problem and the best solution are in demand .
In today’s contemporary society, the world has been confronted with the escalation of the phenomenon in which very few juveniles are inclined to do unpaid community service. Thus this results in a plethora of consequences and this essay will provide the assessment of suggesting one of the best ways to solve those consequences.
4.5
band
In the past, people used to travel to see the differences from their home country. However, the sceneries in places around the world seem similar nowadays. What are the causes of these similarities? Do you think that the advantages of these similarities outweigh the disadvantages?
It is noticeable that globalization enables populaces to influence each other across the region,as a result, causing the uniqueness of tourist attractions in some countries invisible. As a matter of fact that there are advantages, however, I believe that the disadvantages are more significant.
6
band
Some people feel that the design of newly constructed buildings in big cities should be controlled by governments. Others contest those who finance the construction of a building should be free to design it as they see fit. What is your position? Discuss both sides in your response.
The architectural features of a building are often dictated by the owner’s preference. However, a recent argument that the design shall be controlled by the governments has sparked a heated debate. Both views will be discussed based on commercial interests and cultural assassination respectively before a stand can be drawn.

Governments around the world spend too much money on treating illnesses and diseases and not enough on health education and prevention. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Fully explain your ideas

A family has a great influence on children's development, but the outside of home plays a bigger role in it. Do you agree or disagree?

The picture given depicts the spending of The United Kingdom and France in 2010 on several commodities.

In many nations , only a minority of young people are willing to do unpaid community service . There are many arguments that shows many negative outcomes because of this problem and the best solution are in demand .

In the past, people used to travel to see the differences from their home country. However, the sceneries in places around the world seem similar nowadays. What are the causes of these similarities? Do you think that the advantages of these similarities outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people feel that the design of newly constructed buildings in big cities should be controlled by governments. Others contest those who finance the construction of a building should be free to design it as they see fit. What is your position? Discuss both sides in your response.