Some people think that the development of technology has made our life more complex, and the solution is to live a simpler life without technology. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Presently, with the advancements in
the
modern technology Correct article usage
apply
people
are showing interest to work
even on holidays. So, certain Change preposition
in working
people
opine that machinery plays a major role in making their lives
more tedious. Indeed, the best way to counter these problems to
experience their Add a missing verb
is to
lives
by completely eliminating it
. I agree with these viewpoints and suggest my opinion.
Correct pronoun usage
them
Firstly
, the computer plays a major role in every person's life, while
most of them cannot imagine their Correct word choice
and
lives
without it. Indeed, these devices help them to complete their work easily, but they are causing a lot of damage to their personal lives
. A research
stated Remove the article
Research
90
% of the Correct word choice
that 90
people
, who were working as software professionals, got divorced because they were not good at managing their social life
. Fix the agreement mistake
lives
Secondly
, mobile phones were
another Wrong verb form
are
devices
that Fix the agreement mistake
device
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
a
huge damage to Remove the article
apply
the
public health. So, these devices are considered Correct article usage
apply
as
the most addictive tools in Change preposition
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
modern day
gadgets. Add a hyphen
modern-day
However
, the majority of the tasks in the 20th century had
completed by using Verb problem
were
the
mobile phones.
Correct article usage
apply
Moreover
, with the improvements in technology people
were able to finish their task
within the deadline, but they were not able to improve social communication in society. Though these Fix the agreement mistake
tasks
people
earn a
plenty of money and stature in their life, Remove the article
apply
but
they Remove the conjunction
apply
were
not willing to establish new connections in society and Wrong verb form
are
to
work for the welfare of Fix the infinitive
apply
the
surroundings.
In conclusion, technology Change the word
their
had
helped a lot in improving public Wrong verb form
has
lives
, but people
started focusing only on earning money and other activities. Therefore
, I consciously believe that the public should start working for the welfare of society and establish a good relationship with their neighbours.Submitted by 151fa04164 on
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coherence and cohesion
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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