People sleep less than before in many countries. Why do people sleep less? What effect does it have on an individual and society?

#people #countries #effect #society

It has been observed that people in numerous nations are sleeping less than they used to in the past. Addiction of mobile phones is a vital reason behind

this

issue. It has impacted the

humans

Suggestion

human

humans'

health, and

society

has

also

become aggressive than before. Introduction of portable devices and social networking sites have deteriorated sleeping hours of a person. It has been observed that if a person is going to sleep, he

tend

Suggestion

tends

to spend a couple of hours of his rest time on

facebook

Suggestion

Facebook

in most developed or developing countries. According to a recent survey of BBC, youngsters spend more than 8 hours of their day in updating their status on social media or in checking others social

accoounts

a record or narrative description of past events

accounts

account

Consequently

, they sacrifice their sleep hours. If

this

tendency will hold for a couple of decades in

younger generation

Suggestion

the younger generation

a younger generation

their future will be affected harshly. As people are deducting their nap hours, it

have

Suggestion

has

detrimental effects on their mental health. Creativity among the masses has decreased to the lowest level in

past couple

Suggestion

the past couple

of years because they aren't taking adequate sleep which a human body requires to work efficiently. Paucity of sleep is

also

making them

shot

cheat someone by not returning him enough money

short

tempered which

Accept comma addition

tempered, which

is disastrous for a

society

. People with less rest hours found

themself

reflexive form of "them"

themselves

Suggestion

alteracation

noisy quarrel

altercation

over a minor issue. These changes are making a community intolerable. Its the liability of every individual to take proper rest to have a healthy body and for a productive

society

. To conclude, with above discussed

points it's

Accept comma addition

points, it's

evident that excessive use of electronic devices and social network channels are the main causes for the reduced sleep hours of a person. It has affected the mental health of an individual and has

increase

Suggestion

increased

intolerance in

society

Tue Jan 07 2020

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Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
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Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

291 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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People sleep less than before in many countries. Why do people sleep less? What effect does it have on an individual and society?

Fully explain your ideas

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people.

Some organisations believe that their employees should dress smartly. Other value quality of work above appearance. Discuss both these views and give your own opinions.

Nowadays more and more people want to get things done instantly. Why is it? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

“In many societies in the world, the population is aging rapidly and this is leading to an unsustainable increase in the cost of public healthcare. A nation’s population should pay for their healthcare provision in the future. To what extent do you agree or disagree?”