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Writing Samples
Band 6

The charts below show the growth in the population in some of the world’s largest cities as well as the population distribution in urban and rural areas. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the growth in the population in some of the world’s largest cities as well as the population distribution in urban and rural areas. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The bar graph compares the
population
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growth
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 in
five
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 large
cities
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 between 1970 and 2010
while
Linking Words
 the table lists
down
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apply
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the
five
Use synonyms
 most populous
cities
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 in the world both in 1950 and 2010.
In addition
Linking Words
, the line graph analyses the global
population
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 in rural and urban areas.
Overall
Linking Words
,
Tokyo
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 had the largest
population
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 in 2010 but the
population
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growth
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 in
Bombay
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 and
Jakarta
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 outranked other
cities
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.
Finally
Linking Words
, more people started to live in
cities
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 after 2005 despite a different scenario in earlier years. As the data suggests,
Tokyo
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 had over 15 million residents in 1970 which was three and
five
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 times higher than that of
Bombay
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 and
Jakarta
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 respectively. New York and Shanghai had approximately 14 and 12 million inhabitants
in
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apply
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this
Linking Words
 year. After two decades, New York witnessed a meagre
population
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growth
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while
Linking Words
 it was dramatic both in
Jakarta
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 and
Bombay
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. It is evident that
population
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growth
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 in
Jakarta
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 and
Bombay
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 exceeded all other
cities
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. In 1950, New York, London,
Tokyo
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, Paris and Moskow were the top
five
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 populous
cities
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 in the world. In 2010
Bombay
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, Lagos, Shanghai and
Jakarta
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 ranked in the list by eliminating all other
cites
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cities
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 except
Tokyo
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 which stood first on the chart with over 27 million citizens.
Finally
Linking Words
, the global urban
population
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 in 1980 was below 2
billion
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while
Linking Words
 3
billion
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 lived in villages. The
population
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 in
cities
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 grew steadily and went over 4
billion
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 in 2010 at which point 3
billion
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 global
population
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 resided in rural areas.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "finally, while".
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words population, growth, five, cities, tokyo, bombay, jakarta, billion with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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