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Band 4

Many people say that we now live in ‘consumer societies’ where money and possessions are given too much importance. Others believe that consumer culture has played a vital role in improving our lives. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #‘consumer #societies’ #money #possessions #importance #consumer #culture #role #lives
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The fact that we are living in consumer societies is undeniable. Higher incomes allow people to buy more goods whenever they want to. One group of people
think
Suggestion
thinks
 that thanks to consumerism, the living standards have increased in past decades. The other group, in contrary, states that money and possessions are receiving too much attention.
People´s focus
Suggestion
The people´s focus
 has driven away from real values
such
 as family and friendships.
Living in consumer
Suggestion
Living in a consumer
 society has one big advantage and
that is
 a creation of more job opportunities to cover the
consumers´demand
Suggestion
consumers´ demand
. Knowing the fact that we are constantly judged by a house we live in, a car we drive and the clothes we wear pressures us. By buying a wanted item people reach a state of satisfaction, which is nowadays a very fast process with short-lasting effect.
Therefore one
Accept comma addition
Therefore, one
 purchase leads to another and that keeps the economy spinning. People do not realize that they are shopping just because they can and not because they need to. They work hard and they spend a lot of
time
 building their careers to earn their social status.
However
, they do so
on
Suggestion
at
 the expense of the
time
 spend with their families and friends. I would rather work less and have less, but spend quality
time
 with my beloved once. The main focus of our society has shifted towards building careers and making money.
However
, there
are
Suggestion
is
 still some, who prioritize spending
time
 with their families and friends over money and possessions.
Submitted by doskarova.tereza on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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