IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

It is true that whilst many people use their public parks, this space could be used for young people or developing a business area to create jobs.Explain to what extent you agree or disagree with this statement.

#whilst #people #parks #space #business #area #jobs
While many people recognize the importance of public parks whereas some think that public gardens can be used for residential purposes or for building business empires to provide employment.
Therefore
, I completely disagree with the statement as public parks are necessary for the population. The gardens made for the public in the town or cities plays a vital role in the development of an economy as well as for the individual growth. The kids and the children visit parks to play and enjoy, where they
also
 interact with other human beings. People often go to the gardens to walk, run and spend some time peacefully.
Moreover
, gardens and parks can make cities more visually attractive. If the space for the public grounds would be used for other purposes
such
 as building homes for young people or creating business area to provide jobs, where will the people go who visit parks to play, enjoy or to have some fun? The houses can be built in the residential areas to provide accommodation for the young generation and
moreover
, the business empires can be constructed in the area provided for it. To conclude, public parks are necessary for the population as they have their fundamental rights, whereas
this
 property of the public should not be used for any other purpose. To deal with the growing needs for land use, government should take other measures
such
 as by making more suburb centres.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!