The maps show the park which was built in 1920 and current construction of the park.

The maps show the park which was built in 1920 and current construction of the park.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The two plans illustrate a public
park
established in 1920 and the same
park
now.
Grange
Correct article usage
The Grange
show examples
part was built in a rectangular area with access from Arnold Avenue in the northern direction and from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Eldon street in the southern direction.
Likewise
, there was a fountain occupying the central area
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and a stage for musicians situated
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
the left side of the fountain.
In addition
, a glasshouse to the right of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Eldon street and a pond for
water
plants on the northeast corner opposite.
Moreover
, around the edges of the
park
, there were rose gardens with seats.
On the other hand
, the part has altered considerably since
then
. Now, there is a gigantic rose garden where
fountain
Add an article
the fountain
show examples
stood, with seats all around it.
Similarly
, one of the smaller rose
garden
Change to a plural noun
gardens
show examples
remains on the north side of the
park
.
However
, the stage for musicians
replace
Change the verb form
replaces
show examples
by an amphitheatre for the concerts.
Subsequently
, a
water
feature adds by superseding a glasshouse and the seats.
Following
this
, a pond for
water
plants has
also
been gone and in
this
place,
play
Correct article usage
a play
show examples
area has been built for the children with a cafe nearby.
Lastly
, though access to the
park
is still remained
Change to the active voice
still remains
has still remained
show examples
via the two authentic entrances, there is now a
thrid
Correct your spelling
third
show examples
entrance near
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
water
feature from an underground car
park
.
Submitted by varshathapa575 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words park, water with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "remains" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: