Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Childhood obesity is becoming a problem throughout the developed world.Because of this, some people think that adverts for fast food, sweets and sugary snacks should not be allowed in schools and colleges. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

Some people believe that learning a foreign
language
is only for
travel
and work but other people contradicts saying that it is not the only reason, there
maybe
Suggestion
may be
other
any of various alternatives; some other
another
reason
behing
further back than; at the back of; at the far side of
behind
it. In
this
essay I am going to discuss both
these opinion
Suggestion
these opinions
this opinion
and give my own.
First
of all
language
is the most important
skill
necessary for communication. In order to communicate our
feeling
Suggestion
feelings
properly we
Accept comma addition
properly, we
use
language
.
Now regarding
Accept comma addition
Now, regarding
the
first
part of our essay It is true that some people only learn a foreign
language
in order to
travel
or for work. Without
skill
in a foreign
language it
Accept comma addition
language, it
is difficult to do business in a foreign country. It is even
more hard
Suggestion
harder
to
travel
when you don’t know the place very well. So from
this
point of view foreign
language
is useful only for business and
travel
.
Secondly another
Accept comma addition
Secondly, another
opinion is that journey and trade are not the only reason why someone should learn a abroad
language
. Now
language
is a
skill
, and these days having a
skill
is very important. It
differentiate
Suggestion
differentiates
one from the other.
This
is the era of
global village
Suggestion
the global village
. Everyone is connected with everyone. Not only local but
also
international. So from
this
view point it
Accept comma addition
viewpoint, it
viewpoint it
is necessary to learn a foreign
language
not just for
necessasity but
Accept comma addition
necessities, but
necessities but
for
acquaring
the act of acquiring something
acquiring
a
skill
which will enable oneself to be connected with the world. Now
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
believe that
language
is an
abality
the quality of being able to perform; a quality that permits or facilitates achievement or accomplishment
ability
. In order to connect with the rest of the
world one
Accept comma addition
world, one
should learn a different
language
. In
this
way we will be able to learn and experience new things. It will
also
enable us to get acquire employment not only in the local but
also
abroad.
Finally I
Accept comma addition
Finally, I
strongly hold that
external
Suggestion
the external language
language
should not only be learnt for
expedition
Suggestion
the expedition
and occupation but for gaining a
skill
. Other things will come automatically.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • obesity
  • vulnerability
  • unethical
  • well-being
  • commercial gain
  • cafeteria options
  • nutritional programs
  • fast food advertisements
  • health impacts
  • influence
  • educational environment
  • promote healthier eating habits
What to do next:
Look at other essays: