IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Nowadays in many countries women have full time jobs. Therefore, it is logical to share household tasks evenly between men and women. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#countries #women #time #jobs #household #tasks #men
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Nowadays, an ever increasing number of women
work
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 full time, In
this
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 reality, It is widely believed that
house
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 chores should be between both partners
equally
Suggestion
equal
. I completely agree with
this
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 notion. One of the major reasons to share
work
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 between male and female, both partners equally, is to form gender equality in society and at home. The stereotype of system is that, man should
work
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 for family and women should
work
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 for all
house
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 works and take care of family intensively.
This
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 includes cleaning, cooking and many more.
However
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, in
this
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 approach, women might be abreast of the latest trends and current market status. Not only that, if the same women joins
work
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, that will be arduous for them to adjust with company atmospheres. Due to
this
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, many women avoid taking long maternity leaves, and once they do, it makes sense for both male and female to take care of family, more like sharing family and home responsibilities. Apart from
this
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, there are several drawbacks in the current approach. Few countries do not have the same
house
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 chores, sharing system from the beginning,
such
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 that they have seldom worked on
house
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 cleaning, cooking and other important tasks.
This
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 makes them inexperienced and they might not be able to perform the tasks in perfect manner.
This
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 can lead to quarrels between partners, hindering their family bond.
However
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, the chances of
such
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 conflicts are not high, as these can be solved by few guidance and instructions from wife to follow
such
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 as how to mope and how to do laundry and much more. To sum up,
although
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 there are chances of conflict in family about sharing
house
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 chores equally, but the benefits outweigh the negative aspects.
Submitted by Nirbhay on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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