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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In some societies, the number of crimes comitted by teenagers is growing. Some people think that regardless of age teenagers who commit majour crimes should receive adult punishment. To what extent do you agree of disagree?

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In some countries, the number of
crimes
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 committed by teenagers has shown an upward trend. People think that they should be processed as
adults
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 despite being underage, as long as they were involved in a serious crime. I completely agree that the law should consider them
as
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apply
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adults
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 when they are involved in major
offenses
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offences
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. Teenagers who make the decision to murder or kidnap someone are capable of assuming the consequences. Planning all the details—
such
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 as how to carry out these activities, escape, hide, or find weapons—requires maturity, intelligence, and analytical skills. These qualities and traits are usually developed in adulthood.
For example
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, in Colombia, current regulations consider that every minor who commits a severe crime should go to jail and can be condemned to over 40 years in prison, which is the highest punishment for
adults
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.
In addition
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, they do not have contact with their relatives because they are deemed capable of speaking with their
lawyer
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lawyers
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 and representing themselves. The Colombian community feels satisfied with
this
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 regulation, and they expect it to remain in force for many years. Personally, I feel safer walking outside, as reported cases of juvenile crime have decreased considerably.
However
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, there are others who believe that young criminals should be protected by the law regardless of the severity of their
crimes
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. Current laws still classify them as minors and
therefore
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 subject them to different considerations.
For instance
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, they cannot be sent to prison but must stay in reformatories, and their sentences are much lighter compared to those of
adults
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. In South America, many countries follow
this
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 approach, requiring that children be treated differently, despite the discomfort
this
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 causes among some segments of the population. In conclusion, many believe that any minor who commits murder or similar
crimes
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 should be treated as an adult under the law. Countries like Colombia prosecute teenagers as
adults
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 in serious
crimes
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due to
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 their ability to plan and consider risks.
However
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, others argue that regulations must respect their age, even if a child has committed a murder. In my view, everyone who commits a severe
offense
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offence
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 should be prosecuted as an adult.

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coherence cohesion
Strengthen the logical flow between paragraphs for a more seamless transition between ideas.
task achievement
Ensure there's a balanced discussion of opposing viewpoints to fully address the prompt's requirements.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a clear and well-structured introduction and conclusion that articulate the main stance effectively.
task achievement
Relevant specific examples, such as the situation in Colombia, enhance the argument's credibility and engagement.
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