Some people think that manufactures and shopping malls should sell fewer packaged products while others argue that people have the responsibility to buy products with less packaging. Discuss both view and give your own opinion.

In modern society, many individuals believe that shopping malls and manufacturers should sell fewer packaged
items
.
However
, there are many arguments that it is the responsibility of citizens to buy
items
with fewer packages.
this
essay argues that it is more beneficial for the company which produces the product's independence in the
package
due to
protecting the
environment
rather than the accountability of residents to buy the
items
. It must be recognized that packaging is one of the biggest problems of environmental
pollution
so manufacturers and shopping malls should purchase fewer packaged objects.
This
is because it can help to reduce the amount of rubbish emitted by other customers and lead to a decrease in the
pollution
of the
environment
.
As a result
, inventing objects with less packaging has to protect the
environment
.
Therefore
, it is easy to understand why the responsibility of manufacturers to reduce packaged-in
items
is important to preserve the
environment
.
However
, some individuals say that it was the duty of people who obtained their fewer
package
products.
This
belief is based on the view of some citizens that they have a range choice of goods so they can avoid which
items
have a lot of packages. For that reason, residents should have the ability to buy an item with an independent
package
to help reduce environmental
pollution
.
This
may be true, but when the city applies to produce
items
with less packaging it can lead to consumers buying these products.
This
writer believes that producing fewer
package
products is very beneficial for the
environment
.
This
is
due to
the fact that reducing the number of rubbish emitted helps to prevent environmental
pollution
. Because of
this
, individuals must support
this
work so that they can bring some benefit to their
environment
. In conclusion, reducing the number of rubbish emitted and protecting the
environment
makes life people better. The idea of reducing the packaging of
items
should be considered.
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task achievement
To improve Task Response, you should incorporate more specific examples and case studies to support your points. This will make your arguments more convincing and grounded.
coherence cohesion
For Coherence and Cohesion, it's important to use varied linking words and phrases to ensure smooth transitions between ideas. This will help in making your essay easier to follow for the reader.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to refine your grammar and sentence structures. This can help in expressing ideas more clearly and cohesively.
introduction conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion clearly frame the essay, making it easier for the reader to understand your perspective.
supported main points
Your main points are relevant and address both sides of the argument, giving a balanced view of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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