Nowadays, some celebrities such as film stars, sportsmen and pop musicians are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree? Which jobs should be highly paid?

#celebrities #film #stars #sportsmen #pop #musicians #money #jobs

It is argued whether or not famous personalities

such

as film stars, pop musicians, sportsmen are paid too much

money

. I completely agree with

this

view that these celebrities should not be paid too much. In my opinion, others professionals

such

as doctors, teachers, army people should pay more

money

To begin

with, there are some strong arguments which are in favour of my view.

Firstly

, doctors, teachers, engineer's

are doing

Suggestion

is doing

most important jobs in their life. But they get monthly salary half of the celebrities making in a day.

Moreover

, the

hardwork

Suggestion

hard work

of these professionals is more than famous people.

For example

, a doctor

spend

Suggestion

spends

many years in studying but after getting

job

Suggestion

the job

a job

just earn

Suggestion

just earns

has just earned

half of the celebrities earning. So it us unjustified to

paid

Suggestion

pay

money

to celebrities.

Furthermore

, army people spend their whole lives

Suggestion

risk to save our nation. But they

also

paid less as compared to film stars.

Also

, jobs which involve a high level of responsibilities and pressure

also

deserve a

high

Suggestion

higher

pay. Professions like doctor, politics and teaching are the jobs that require people with high level of perception and proficiency.

Thus

to attract

such

talent to these jobs, it is important to pay them well. On the flip side, some school of thoughts

think

Suggestion

thinks

that it is justified to

paid

Suggestion

pay

money

to celebrities. Because they are the representative of the country and they

also

lose the privacy. To conclude,

money

should be paid according to their talent.

Submitted by sandhunavu098 on Fri Jan 17 2020

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for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

247 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays, some celebrities such as film stars, sportsmen and pop musicians are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree? Which jobs should be highly paid?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many countries, children start learning a second language when they are still in primary school. What are the benefits and drawbacks of learning a second language at an early age? ﻿﻿You should write at least 250 words. ﻿﻿You should spend around 40 minutes on this task.

Women and man are commonly seen as having different strengths and weaknesses. Therefore, some people believe that it is right to exclude males or females from certain professions because of their gender. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

According to some people spending a lot of money on marriage parties is a must. Others insist that lavish celebrations are a waste of money and resources. Both views will be discussed in this essay; however, in my opinion, it does not make much sense to spend a lot of money on celebratio

In many countries, children start learning a second language when they are still in primary school. What are the benefits and drawbacks of learning a second language at an early age? You should write at least 250 words. You should spend around 40 minutes on this task.