Using a computer everyday can have more negative than positive effect on your children.Do you agree or disagree

Technology
such
as
computer
has become a necessity in today’s modern world especially among children.Research shows that daily
use
of
computer
Suggestion
computers
a computer
the computer
can be detrimental rather than beneficial
on
Suggestion
to
for
younger ones.I strongly agree on
this
because, daily
use
of
this
technology can build social and emotional gap among youngsters.
Moreover
, prolonged
use
may
also
lead to health problems in the future. Nowadays, daily
use
of
computer
among kids has become a rampant
problem
in the family.Without proper discipline and guidance
,
Accept space
,
children will prefer to spend all their free time facing the monitor rather than socialising and interacting with other playmates.
This
habit can become
toxic
Accept comma addition
toxic, therefore
therefore
,
Accept space
,
leading to social and emotional
problem
.One good example is a study conducted by the Harvard University.In their research, 40 percent of young people are suffering from depression because of social and emotional
problem
.
Furthermore
,
Accept space
,
it was known that one of the contributing
factor
Suggestion
factors
was
computer
addiction at an early age. Excessive
use
of
computer
may
also
lead to health problems
such
as eye strain and obesity.Due to prolonged exposure of radiation
,
Accept space
,
the eyes are affected.Obesity may
also
become a
problem
to
Suggestion
for
these children because
instead
of playing outdoors or doing active sports
,
Accept space
,
they prefer to spend more time in the monitor which would eventually cause poor blood circulation and digestion
to
Suggestion
in
the body.
Statistic
Suggestion
The statistic
A statistic
also
shows that 30-40 percent who are
computer
addicts may suffer health related problems in later life. In conclusion, daily
use
of
computer
and laptops will have a detrimental effect on children.
This
will have a negative effect on their physical and emotional being.Proper guidance and discipline should be implemented by parents.Limiting the time on how they used it should be properly observed.
Submitted by amity_1987 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Improve your band scores without paying for expensive tutoring
Writing9 scans your text for all types of mistakes, from typos to sentence structure problems and beyond.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Read more in the eBook

The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »

* free ebook for Premium users

What to do next:
Look at other essays:
Turn your IELTS writing into band 7+
Get 60% discount and enjoy a quick and easy way to check IELTS Writing Task 1&2!