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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The chart below illustrates the result of a British survey on the types of houses people liked, taken in 2005.

The chart below illustrates the result of a British survey on the types of houses people liked, taken in 2005.
The given column graph illustrates housing preferences among
people
Use synonyms
 who lived in the British cities of
London
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,
Oxford
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 and
Cambridge
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 in the year 2005. Four types of
houses
Use synonyms
 are mentioned,
such
Linking Words
 as flats, terraced
houses
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, detached
houses
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 and semi-detached
houses
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. 58% of Londoners listed ‘flats’ as their preferred living arrangement, a number much higher than its
Oxford
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 and
Cambridge
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 counterparts, at 29% and 20% respectively. Fondness of terraced housing was roughly equal between the three cities, all of which showed figures within the 16% to 19% range.
However
Linking Words
, a stark difference was seen among the figures representing
people
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 who preferred detached
houses
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, with
London
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 at 9%,
Oxford
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 at 25% and
Cambridge
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 at 36%. 17% of
people
Use synonyms
 living in
London
Use synonyms
 in 2005 preferred
semi-detached
Correct article usage
a semi-detached
show examples
 style of housing.
Oxford
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 and
Cambridge
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,
however
Linking Words
, both had figures of 27%.
Overall
Linking Words
,
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people
Correct article usage
the people
show examples
 of
London
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 preferred flats and the
people
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 of
Cambridge
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 preferred detached
houses
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.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, london, oxford, cambridge, houses with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • survey
  • illustrates
  • result
  • British
  • types of houses
  • people
  • liked
  • taken
  • 2005
  • chart
  • popular
  • least popular
  • description
  • discussion
  • summary
  • key findings
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