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Band 4

High job demands, stress and sense of commitment are among the main reasons people go to work when they are ill. This way they accomplish important tasks, but may infect others or get some serious health problems themselves. In your opinion should people go to work if they are sick? Support your point of view with relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

#job #demands #stress #sense #commitment #people #work #tasks #health #support #point
Having job is
Suggestion
Having a job is
 very important in
this
 society. Job which
help
Suggestion
helps
 us to earn money which help us in everyday living. Job which we can meet different people and help us to
built
Suggestion
build
 a better future.
but
Suggestion
But
, having job need of full time commitment like in office
work sometimes they
Suggestion
work, sometimes they
 need to finish
there
of them or themselves
their
work
 before going home or when you
work
in
Suggestion
at
mall
Suggestion
the mall
a mall
 during
holiday
Suggestion
the holiday
 they did not allow
employee
Suggestion
employees
the employee
an employee
 to take a break or taking
dayoff
Suggestion
a day off
day off
the day off
 that's the time that
other
Suggestion
the other
 is getting
stress
Suggestion
stressed
 and getting sick. Other
employee
 they decide to go to
work
Accept comma addition
work, although
although
 they are not feeling well because of some reasons.
first some
Accept comma addition
First, some
First some
 of the company they ask the
employee
 medical record to prove that they are sick or not feeling well during the day that they not go to
work
.
next
Suggestion
Next
, was some
employee
 who's really need money they choose to go to
work
 while they are sick because they
dont
do not
don't
 want to deduct any amount in
there
of them or themselves
their
 salary. In my opinion in
this
 kind of society we have now it is better not to go
work
 when we are not feeling well or sick.
sometimes
Suggestion
Sometimes
 simple problems
becomes
Suggestion
become
 big problem.
many
Suggestion
Many
 of us think that it's a simple headaches or body pain sometimes we ignore it so we decide to go
work but
Accept comma addition
work, but
 at the end it
getting
Suggestion
gets
is getting
worst so
Suggestion
worse, so
worse so
 for me it is better not to go to
work
 when we are sick.
Also
, to company it is better to have a rules and regulations about
this
 matter so that the
employee
 will determine or know what she/he needs to do when she or he experience
this
 kind of
situition
the general state of things; the combination of circumstances at a given time
situation
situations
.
health
a healthy state of wellbeing free from disease
Health
 is
very important company
Suggestion
a very important company
 cannot earn money without the help of
there
of them or themselves
their
employee
 so they need to protect and give rest to
there
of them or themselves
their
employee
Suggestion
employees
.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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