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Writing Samples
Band 5

The role of education is to prepare children for modern world.Schools should cut art and music out of the curriculam so that children can focus on useful subjects such as information technology. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

The main goal of education is to make children ready to face
modern world
Suggestion
the modern world
.Schools should remove art and music from the syllabus so that pupils can concentrate more on important subjects
such
Linking Words
 as computer skills.
Although
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
it is one of the possible suggestion out of many.I
largly
in large part; mainly or chiefly
largely
 agree with the notion.The reasons for my agreement are described in
further
Linking Words
 paragraphs.
To begin
Linking Words
 with my
first
Linking Words
 argument
,
Accept space
,
the technology plays a vital role in educational life.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
institutes should remove extra curricular activity to concentrate on
technological subject
Suggestion
technological subjects
a technological subject
the technological subject
.
it
Suggestion
It
 is an
indespensable
not to be dispensed with; essential
indispensable
 requirement that almost every recruiter
skeeks
try to get or reach
seeks
 in a resume to hire a person as an employee because in
modern world
Suggestion
the modern world
 the technological skills are important for
development
Suggestion
the development
 of an organization.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
with the help of artificial intelligence
,
Accept space
,
it can solve
complex problem
Suggestion
complex problems
a complex problem
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
by the use of internet children can have access to almost unlimited sources of knowledge and information in the same way students can increase
acadamic
associated with academia or an academy
academic
 knowledge as well as extra activities and it can be helpful for encouraging students about technology.Other than
this
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 use for studies to make more effective due to visual effects.
For example
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
In Knowledge school
,
Accept space
,
anand
Suggestion
Anand
,
Accept space
,
it
use
Suggestion
uses
 digital classes
for
Suggestion
to
 increase the effectiveness of education.
However
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
art and music are
also
Linking Words
 important in
students carriculam
Suggestion
the students' curriculum
students curriculum
students' curriculum
students' carriculam
student's carriculam
student carriculam
.It shows hidden talent in student regarding to painting and music because some children are
intrested
having or showing interest; especially curiosity or fascination or concern
interested
 in extra activities rather than studies.To state
further
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
it reduces mental stress.It is
also
Linking Words
 helpful in brain refreshment activities. In conclusion
,
Accept space
,
institutions should mostly focus on subject that are helpful in pupil's future benefits rather than extra
acadamic
associated with academia or an academy
academic
 activities.In my opinion technological subjects are more preferable than extra subjects.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Diverse curriculum
  • Well-rounded development
  • Modern job market
  • Information technology
  • Fostering creativity
  • Critical thinking
  • Emotional intelligence
  • Cultural literacy
  • Adaptability
  • STEM subjects
  • Innovative thinkers
  • Customized education
  • Artistic expression
  • Cognitive skills
  • Career paths
  • Multifaceted learning
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