Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Television has destroyed communication among friends and family. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.
Some
people
believe that today's communication between friends and relatives has been made worse by television
. In this
essay, I will discuss this
topic taking into account reasons in support and against this
belief.
Firstly
, in almost any family there is that one person that
Correct pronoun usage
who
spend
the majority of his Change the verb form
spends
time
in front of television
, zapping through the channels and avoiding any contact with the other family members. Add an article
the television
a television
This
habit can ruin not only our relationship with our parents or our siblings,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
with our friends. Because of television
, these people
avoid going out and spend
some Wrong verb form
spending
time
doing some valuable activity with other people
of their age. The consequences are obviously not good. Isolation, loneliness and laziness cane
make a person's life much more sad and difficult. Correct your spelling
can
Socialize
is one of the most fundamental things to do, especially when we are young, the age Wrong verb form
Socializing
in
which we should make our most important friendships.
Change preposition
at
On the other hand
, I don't believe that television
only can be blamed for this
condition that some people
unfortunately live.
I grew Change preposition
in.
watching
Change preposition
up watching
television
, but this
never prevented me from also
going outside and play
with my friends in the park. I think that Wrong verb form
playing
family's
role is very important in educating, especially the young, to not spend too much Correct article usage
the family's
time
in front of a screen, because our time
is precious and we should spend it doing valuable activities with valuable people
.
Finally
, I believe that television
cannot be considered as an evil instrument that make
us lazy and lonely Change the verb form
makes
people
. If used well, TV could be also
instructive, so it depends from
Change preposition
on
us
how we use it. We should be able to understand if are watching too much Correct pronoun usage
apply
television
and consequently
wasting too much time
of
our life.Change preposition
in
Submitted by danieleperrone459 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
In the introduction, it is important to directly address the given statement and state your position clearly.
task response
Your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and presents clear and comprehensive ideas. However, providing more specific examples to support your points would further strengthen your response.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite