IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Financial education should be a mandatory component of the school program. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#education #component #school #program
It is an obvious fact that financial aspects are a major part of the daily life, as an adult and even as a young individual. Each and any of us has to make financial decisions concerning recreation, health, schooling and more. The question is whether to start with financial matters as part of the school program or to postpone it for a later stage in life.
To begin
 with, being able to understand the value of money, the way the economic system works and to interpret financial news and its implications is a virtue. Without
this
 virtue, an individual, even a young one, might suffer to some extent. For an example, a child who doesn’t understand the concept of money might find it more difficult to except choosing only one present out of more possible ones.
In addition
, many adults are lacking the capability of financial analysis. Quite often, the reason can be the lack of sound foundations or insecurity when it comes to financial terms and concepts. Starting from an early age, building a strong background, can very likely prevent
such
 situation.
However
, financial education necessarily involves quantifying and setting prices and value for services and goods. It can easily turn young people into cynical human beings who lack emotion.
Furthermore
, a tendency to self-concentration and egoism might arise when one start measuring everything from a profit-making perspective. In conclusion, financial education has both pros and cons. In my opinion, the advantages are more significant than the disadvantages, making financial education an advisable component of the school program. The disadvantages should be thought of as a certain price that young people have to pay due to the characteristics of the world that we live in.
Submitted by khodamoradi.a on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: