Nowadays people get married and have kids in their thirties rather than when they are younger. Do you agree or disagree that this trend will benefit society?

#people #kids #thirties #trend #benefit #society

In today's society, public opinion about the birthing problem has changed and the modern generation in

this

volatile social

conditions

Suggestion

condition

tends to postpone their

first

childbirth. Personally, I believe that under the circumstance increasing

pregnancy age

Accept comma addition

pregnancy, age

has positive effects over family and society condition and status quo

also

this

trend. The fact that giving birth at later stages of

life

has been more common stemming from running business and job promotion and regarding the difficult situation to earn livelihood many couple precautions to avoid pregnancy. Driving force of

this

approach caused by escalating expenditure that

impel

Suggestion

impels

couple both

Accept comma addition

couple, both

men and women working full-time. On the whole,

this

tendency has long been a common thing because people want to be financially stable and strong enough to properly take charge of the new responsibility.

Furthermore

, getting married late has

positive effect

Suggestion

a positive effect

on family commitment

as a result

of being couples mature.

Although

, the

parents

Suggestion

parent

structure the community of aging population their age and experience provide a suitable cultural infrastructure that results in offspring have a good upbringing. Even get married over 30s can due to the fact that adults achieve in their activities including good quality education and comprehensive education and in terms of wisdom can cope with problems more logically and in a nutshell will bring a close-knit family that it

never break

Suggestion

never breaks

down at ease. In conclusion, the consequences of having a settle married

life

and birthing problem stems from how parents attain a changeless

life

and

this

dire need for

provoking great

Accept comma addition

provoking, great

upheaval in the intellectual evolution and stable income and these are not possible unless get married in about middle-age. The thing is we need to a settle

life

and its required is

Suggestion

being

more mature in all fields.

Submitted by z.abbaspour1992 on Tue Feb 04 2020

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

292 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.5

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

financial stability
emotional maturity
secure upbringing
career prospects
education and career development
lifetime earnings
job satisfaction
health outcomes
demographic shift
population growth
ageing population
parental preparedness
responsibilities of parenting
modern healthcare
capable of having healthy pregnancies
balancing population growth
establish careers
save money
healthier relationships
better parenting

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Nowadays people get married and have kids in their thirties rather than when they are younger. Do you agree or disagree that this trend will benefit society?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe that it is best to do the same type of work throughout your life. Others feel that it is beneficial to change jobs often. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that thia would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be compulsory in high school programmes (for example, working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children).

Nowadays many people travel to foreign countries for pleasure. Some believe this travel has a negative impact on the countries travelled to. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In future, robots may do more of the work that is done by humans today. would the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?