IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

It is no longer necessary to use animals for food, clothing or medical research. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#animals #food #research
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Nowadays, animals are widely used in many areas. Some people think it will be unnecessary to
use
 them in the near future. I disagree with
this
 idea to a certain extent. While it is true that animal products can be replaced by synthetic products in the clothing industry, humans will still need animals for food and medical
research
. We do find a lot of ways to avoid using animals.
First
 many types of alternative foods, invented by scientists, taste like meat but are made of soybeans. So people who eat these fake meat dishes can remain vegetarians and still get all the nutrients they need. Using animals for medical
research
 is indeed cruel and immoral. After all, we do not have the right to kill other forms of life for our benefit. Fortunately, the
use
 of animals in medical
research
 and trials is decreasing rapidly. In the clothing industry,
also
, it is now possible to avoid using animals.
For example
, synthetic fur and synthetic silk look as good as the real thing and their production does not involve any cruelty to animals. Even so, it is nearly impossible to stop using animals altogether.
For example
, fish and meat are an integral part of many cuisines around the world. They are major sources of vitamins, minerals and proteins. Meat substitutes are usually expensive and hard to find in many markets. So, if people are told to stop using animal products, they may fail to get adequate nutrition.
Likewise
, it is impossible to perform medical
research
 without using animals. Of course,
this
 practice is unethical and scientists are working hard to minimise the
use
 of animals, yet there is no justification for stopping the production of some crucial drugs just because their testing involves animals. In summary, we need to respect animals’ right to live and reduce their
use
 for purposes of vanity;
however we
Accept comma addition
however, we
 cannot avoid using them for meeting our nutritional requirements or performing medical
research
.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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